Not About Bush or Survivor

Okay, since all I ever Blog about these days are one of those two topics, I will now attempt to change the subject, with some random observations.
- There is no reasonable way to wear a sweater draped over one's shoulders without looking like a clown. The catalogs all feature that look to sell more sweaters, but in real life that look lacks functionality and makes the wearer look like he or she wants to be Jackie O.
-How many catalogs do LL Bean, Eddie Bauer and Land's End think I need per week?
-My ex girlfriend told me she was initially impressed with her new lover because she didn't trash her ex. She went on to say her new lover doesn't think much of me, in fact she has an intense dislike for me. Must have been something she heard, since we don't know each other. Isn't that ironic?
-I just enrolled in a great new phone plan that allows me free long distance calls all the time. Send me your number- let's talk.
-A friend of mine just moved into a great but funky old apartment. The window air conditioners send out dog-scented air. How can that be eliminated?
-No matter how much you work out or how developed your muscles have become, moving furniture will always end up hurting your back.
-Kids will eat anything if it's shaped like a dinosaur.
-Why did Sears stop selling popcorn and warm, roasted nuts?
-The weapons inspectors didn't find any WMD's in Iraq during the course of their search. Now they want more time and millions more in funding to continue the search. That's like the termite inspector coming to your house, inspecting, finding nothing then suggesting they keep checking once a week just in case.
-Rush Limbaugh had a constitutional right to make those racist comments on ESPN. They cost him his job, but I defend his right to make an ass of himself. Maybe it was the illegal pain killers that made him do it. I noticed he didn't have much to say about THAT topic.
-If Shwartzenegger gets elected, California deserves him. I used to kind of like him, but with the recent dirt coming out on him he seems pretty creepy. I remember seeing him as a weightlifter back when I lived at Venice Beach in the 70's. I thought he was just one of the gay muscle boys back then.
-Roy of Siegfried and Roy was attacked and critically injured by a tiger during a show at the Mirage. Roy, the brunette, is still in the hospital. The tiger assailant was making his stage debut when he attacked him. Perhaps they should sell him to Mike Tyson.