Friday, September 10, 2010

There Are Places for Screaming Kids



I know if I walk into Toys R Us, McDonald's or Walmart, there's a good chance my ears will be assaulted by the piercing sound of some bratty kid who's screaming his or her little guts out.
The brat's parents are either inured to it, or they just don't give a damn what their kid's screeching is doing to other patrons.
I do not patronize establishments where children are likely to be screaming.
Grocery stores cannot be avoided, but the higher-end the store, the less likely there will be screaming brats present.
If I'm at a restaurant that does not offer a kiddy menu, then I should feel safe to assume little screech owls will not be there, allowed to ruin my meal.
If I'm at a movie rated GP, R or X, then there should be no goddam kids there at all.
If the cost of my meal is $10 or more, same thing.
I can think of two kids who were adorable as toddlers--my nephews Sam and Albert. They were not screamers or tantrum throwers in public. Their daddy (my bro) would have dealt with them later in a manner that would have discouraged further public outbursts.
Rule of thumb: if the locale serves alcohol, children should shut the hell up or we all get to smash pie in their faces or throw ice water at them.
I didn't have kids partly because I don't like all the screaming.
That means I don't want to hear your screaming kids, either.
If you own kids who make scenes in public, make them stop it. Now.

8 comments:

South Austin Viceroy said...

And to add to your observation, airplanes are off limits as a fucking daycare. I was on a SW flight Tuesday night from Salt Lake City and got to enjoy two kids screaming while Mom and Dad had their Bud Lights. When we landed in Austin the whole family received a big, obvious stare with all of saying "dumbshits."

nonnie9999 said...

my son was a good baby, but once in a while he'd have his moments. if he got fussy in a restaurant, i would take him outside until he calmed down. i don't understand why all people don't do that. that won't work on an airplane, but it would everywhere else.

Matthew Hubbard said...

In my neighborhood, there are a lot more kids at Trader Joe's than at Lucky, but more screaming kids at Lucky.

Jerry Melton said...

I've noticed working in retail that the worse kids are totally tuned out by the parents who ignore them until they suddenly unload with crude brutality. My kid behaved quite well through childhood. It was middle teens that turned her into a total shitass.

bigsis said...

I totally blame the parents. Little kids should not be dragged to restaurants, shopping, movies etc after about 6pm because they're simply too tired to cope. And as nonnie said, the parents just ignore them so of course they get louder to get some attention. Those crappy parents on the airline should have bought Bud for everyone on the plane, and maybe brought a snack or toys for their screaming children.

Not that we have a choice anymore, but if I had to choose between a smoking and non-smoking area in a restaurant, I'd pick the smokers just to avoid the kids.

Fran said...

Well, at least you know the airway is clear.

Fran said...

Oh! The local performing arts theater charges full adult fare for infants if people want to bring along an infant to a show. We're talking spendy tickets.

Bedia said...

OMG! I can not agree with you more. I was @ the dollar movies last week and a couple had two kids with them, one was a baby and the other one must've been 3 or 4 and the little bugger was running around the theater. I'm talking taking laps around the whole place like he was training 4 a marathon! The whole thing was compounded by the fact that he had those shoes that light up, so not only was he a distraction running around he was also pissing me off. So I got up and complained to the people @ the theater. They did talked to them and they took the kid out, but of course this only lasted 4 a few minutes because the parents wanted to finish watching the movie. And of course the brat kept on running. Then towards the end of the movie (which I can't even remember which one it was) he decided that running around and start slapping every arm on each seat that he passed by. I swear I was praying that he would fall and hurt himself so that the parents would leave. I understand that not everyone can afford a baby sitter, but paying patrons shouldn't have to suffer because they choose to take their kids with them to the movies, which by the way I remembered was twighlight eclipse.