Monday, August 27, 2007

Adios, You Miserable MoFo

Finally! Bush's swishy Tio Tomas Attorney General has resigned.
How I loathe guys like him who are knee-deep here in South Texas.
No, not because he's Hispanic. Not because his caustic TexMex accent grates on my nerves like a jackhammer during nap time. Not because his hair looks like he slept all night in a tight hairnet.
It's because his arrogance, ignorance and selling out to The Man combine to make me want to punch him as hard as I can right in the face.
Brilliant comedian Carlos Mencia might refer to Gonzales as a "beaner made good."
Sure, it's a racist thing to say, but being half beaner myself, I know beaners.
Okay, okay, ease up.
I won't call him a beaner, instead I'll call him a Muppie. That's a Mexican Yuppie.
Want some evidence? Okay, he's been married twice-- first to Diane Clemens and now to Rebecca Turner.
Muppies always want to marry Anglos so they can have kids who don't reflect their self loathing, internalized racism.
Second, Muppies suck up to the white patriarchy by any means possible.
To have a Hispanic Texas man sacrifice all that is holy by sucking the lily white dick of George W. Bush in order to distance himself from his wetback family history is a disgrace.
To have a Hispanic Texas man turn out to be a Republican is a slap in the face to anyone with even one drop of Latino blood.
To have a Hispanic Texas man lie and cheat and ramrod the United States Constitution and the people of America in order to do Bush's shameless, partisan bidding is unforgivable.
Sure, I can be a dutiful reporter and rehash the disgraceful legal maneuvering he perpetrated against the American taxpayers on behalf of Bush, but we all know it by heart.
Like Bush, Gonzales is just one more gutless Neo-con liars who'll fuck anyone to get ahead.
So goodbye, you miserable Muppie prick. And good riddance.


Lulu Maude said...

Nice nose!

Distributorcap said...

based on your comment i would think you didn't like Mr Gonzales....

did Turd Blossom throw some turds on Bush's little Texas blossom

ps -- great rant!

dguzman said...

GREAT post -- as a fellow hispanic woman, I'm right there with you, especially about that ridiculous TexMex accent. Man, I hated hearing people talk that in when I lived in TX.

Did you see that picture of Gone-Zo and his Great White Prize with GW and Crazy Eyes? Lovely. Big hair and everything -- Mami and Papi must've been sooo friggin' proud that their little Beto done good.

Pardon me while I go throw up.

Kick-ass post, man.

Anonymous said...

You sell your soul to worship at the feet of the Repubs, you end up slinking away in disgrace. He got what he deserves.

Your post said it all Zip.

Pursey Tuttweiler said...

He is a killer. He is a psychopathic killer. He is a legalized killer and torturer. He is the most sickening man to ever walk the face of the earth, more sickening than his boss. I also think he is gay. I think he is self-loathing because he is a gay republican muppie.

karenzipdrive said...

I've always thought he was part of the clandestine GOP gay mafia.

Anonymous said...

Hasn't it already been established that Republican men are all gay? Except of course Senator Larry Craig (R- Idaho) who swears he's not gay and has never been gay. He just has a "wide stance" while sitting on the crapper reaching his disgusting fingers under the wall.