Saturday, March 31, 2007

Weekend Snippets

Yesterday I was at the Army hospital seeing the optometrist. As I stood in line, I started chatting with a frumpy sort of bloated guy about 58 or 60-years-old.
CNN was playing in the background, and we both watched a snippet about the British sailors Iran was holding. Then I said, "Oh great, I guess that means we're going to invade Iran next."
See, by now I just assume everyone realizes the Iraq invasion was a mistake, so now I speak freely about it even on an Army post. But then I mostly only talk to doctors when I'm there, and they certainly share my views regardless of their military rank or civilian status.
Anyway, the guy in line turned out to be a totally enraged wing-nut.
First, he told me he was a covert military agent in Germany during the Vietnam era, where he said he was trained to drive trains, then learned to work the switches and derail them in preparation for the military's secret plans to invade Iran. He said his ultimate assignment would have been to hijack an Iranian train, kill all the crew and take the train over. But them he said the special op was canceled without explanation.
Why do these nuts who allege to be covert agents always want to blab about it?
I didn't bother to ask questions because the whole story so defied credulity I had no idea where to begin in my debunking expedition. Some battles just aren't worth the trouble.
Anyway, he went on to explain to me why the Bush invasion of Iraq was vital to our national security. Basically, he parroted the neo-con sound byte playbook and I took the bait and started challenging each erroneous point, one by one. He was getting angry, but then so was I.
I mentioned being a journalist, then he said, "Oh well, that explains it, all journalists are communists,"
I laughed out loud and asked if he watched Fox News. He said, "Of course I do."
I said, "Well, what do you call their reporters, zoo keepers?"
Before he could frame his cro-magnon reply, I chuckled, moved toward him to playfully pat his shoulder and said to him, "So the truth is, you don't think all journalists are communists, just the ones you disagree with."
He recoiled in horror, moved back and in a loud voice said, "Don't you dare try to touch me!"
Just then his name was called and he stomped away.
As he stormed off, I said, "Hey, you might want to ask for a psych consult while you're in there."
I don't think he heard me, but the people at the desk did and they died laughing after he left the area.
That prick. I should have smacked him.
When did calling people communists come back into vogue? Are these neo-com imbeciles are so out of it they still use 1960's insults? I should have called him a Whig.
I don't know why I still let these Bushian lemmings get to me. They are so much in the minority now, I should be basking in the serenity of my prescience about Bush and his vanity war and simply look upon them as I would any mentally disabled person.

I planned to do some serious gardening this weekend but last night's mammoth thunderstorm has turned my yard into a cranberry bog.
Oh, well. I guess I could look at San Antonio.com and see if the communists are having any mixers this weekend.

2 comments:

Lulu Maude said...

Oh, Zippie, how you love a good rumble.

Are you sure you aren't Irish?

It's nice to know that the communists are never far away.

Unknown said...

LMFAO!! I love to mix it up w/the wingnuts..but it can be hazardous to ones health..they are THAT far gone.