Tuesday, August 21, 2007


The DWP: Trying a New Tactic

My boss, the Devil Wears Payless, has been peaches and cream sweet all week. I know she's up to something.
She's got an event I'm covering tomorrow night; maybe it's as simple as her wanting lots of flattering photos taken.
She sent me to cover a horrid thing this evening, sponsored by a notoriously homophobic funeral director. It was a presentation of a new electronic death reporting system. Only 10 people showed up.
The site was the oldest, honkiest country club in town. Downstairs in the main dining salon were the members, ladies in silver blue hair styled like Ann Landers and elderly gentlemen with elegantly tailored slacks draping their paunches (as well as can be expected. All the staff was black, dressed in starchy white uniforms and steppin' and fetchin' like they were in a 1930s movie.
I wasn't about to stay for the whole event. I took two pictures, pocketed a few business cards and headed for the buffet, where I grabbed two enchiladas verdes, a little pile of fajitas, a wad of guacamole and a little salad.
I sat with a very cute medical practice manager and an adorable young doctorette- fresh out of residency. I regaled them with funny stories, then split the second the speaker took the dais.
The DWP may not be especially mean this week, but I'm still suspicious. Her fashion accessory tonight is a doggy toy shaped like a shoe. Bitches love chew toys and these are from Jimmy Chew. $14.

7 comments:

nobody's fool said...

"...a new electronic death reporting system." -- I thought that was the media.

I do believe DWP will look smashing while chomping on her new chew toy.

Anonymous said...

creepy...seems that
DWP's only happy when she's being cruel or about to be cruel. watch your back Zip.

Jane said...

Schmackos are cheaper and would probably last longer..

Anonymous said...

The DWP won't take dog treats, Jane, I've tried that.

Pursey Tuttweiler said...

Why do you have to take pictures of the DWP? Can't she just hold the camera in front of her face like the rest of us?

dguzman said...

DEFINITELY watch yer back. She's obviously up to something. Do you think she's started a file on you?

Oh my gosh, my word verif is
oyzbad

That says it all.

Anonymous said...

oyzbad- priceless~
I think if they start a file on you, unless you've actually seen it and signed it proving that you've seen it, it's a case of "prove it."