Friday, May 14, 2010

Arizona: The Snakebit State

Arizona's unconstitutional, draconian, racist immigration law that allows cops to harass anyone who looks even vaguely Latino has started to bite the state in its own pasty white ass.
It seems Phoenix was under consideration to host the 2012 Republican National Convention, but the GOP honchos nixed it because of the new law.
You see, the GOP doesn't like to parade its racist tendencies in public. They like to keep it on the down-low, as their token negro Michael Steele might say.
Instead of Phoenix, they opted for Tampa, Florida.
Please note that Phoenix sounds like Penis and Tampa sounds like Tampax.
The amusing thing about Phoenix getting the Big Ig from the GOP is that the law that Republicans like Senator John McCain like to covertly endorse has ended up screwing them, like a snake eating its own tail.
If the new law wasn't so repugnant, it would be hilariously stupid.
It's a law so stupid, I'm amazed Sarah Palin didn't come up with it. I'll bet she was envious she didn't come up with it when she was a governor, but I guess Alaska didn't have enough Latinos to harass. I guess she could have gone after the Inuit (Eskimo) population, but I'm pretty sure their Alaskan roots are deep enough to not be mistaken for Russian wetbacks.
I have a plan for Arizona Governor Jan Brewer and Sarah Palin to repair their horrible reputations. First, they should collect all the hair clippings from every beauty salon and barber shop in Arizona and Alaska.
Then they should find someone to manufacture two giant pairs of panty hose.
After that, Brewer and Palin should have all that hair glued to their bodies, from head to toe.
Then they should each be stuffed into the pairs of giant panty hose, and lowered to the base of the BP oil spilling in the Gulf. Their heroism could help plug up the pipes and stem the oil flow.
Both would say it's quite noble to die in service to the country, so I challenge them to prove it.
God Bless America!


nonnie9999 said...

they might regret that they picked tampa after the oil gets washed up on the beach (it will be really bad if tampa really is a tampon). they won't be able to invite deadeye dick or his ugly snarling daughter without reporters pointing out that deadeye dick and his oil buddies were to blame for the leak.

Karen Zipdrive said...

Oh I'm sure the reporters on the right won't mention it, and those on the left won't be allowed to get close enough to any of the major players any questions.

Distributorcap said...

that was hysterical

Karen Zipdrive said...

I am loving all the negative press Arizona is getting. The late night comedians have made AZ the butt of more jokes than Tiger Woods got.