Tuesday, November 23, 2010

Let's Connect the Dots, Shall We?



Suddenly, out of nowhere, American airline travelers trying to clear security have been given a choice between electronic body scans or manual pat-downs on every square inch of their bodies.
Sure, the body scans reveal too much of the anatomy and can cause embarrassment and potential exposure on the Internet, but would it be better to let some random airport security clerk feel you up from head to toe?
Some people are reluctant to be electronically screened because they fear exposure to radiation, especially pilots, flight attendants and frequent business travelers.
Some men and women have sensitive penises and/or nipples. A light stroke during a manual pat-down could easily result in hardened erectile tissue that could warrant closer, even more humiliating examination.
Neither option is suitable, and one wonders why the sudden introduction to these procedures without a big roll-out or even a governmental statement before the enhanced screening programs began.
Then I heard on the news the company that manufactures the enhanced body scanning machines have more than doubled the amount they spent last year on political lobbyists and campaign contributions.
So they set up a choice: have some potentially creepy weasel fondling breasts, buttocks, vaginas, penises and testicles to their heart's content, or have your body screened so the clerks can basically see what you look like totally nude.
In my opinion, most travelers would prefer not to have a stranger's hands on their entire bodies, so they'd opt for the still-invasive electronic option.
The sudden introduction of these so-called security measures made me suspicious--then when I heard about the lobbyists, it all fell into place.
This further proves that America has become a fascist nation, where corporations dictate to elected officials what their policies will be.
Politicians may enter office with a sincere desire to serve their constituents, but running for office is extremely expensive and Joe Sixpack's $20 annual contribution to the candidate of his choice isn't enough to get him or her elected...even for a local office like the city council or a school board.
To be sure, we need our airports to be as secure as the Tel Aviv airport, but decisions on how to detect malicious passengers should be based on reality, not on campaign donations made by slimy corporate lobbyists.
Obama's people are making all sorts of ludicrous statements trying to justify these two odious new search methods.
Et tu, Barack?

8 comments:

bigsis said...

Once again our elected officials are profiting by fueling the public's Fear, Uncertainty and Doubt. Clearly there are terrorists out there who want to blow up US planes but aside from the public complaining no one really knows how to resolve the situation. Most experts agree that radiation from the machines is dangerous, being groped by a stranger isn't the answer and bomb sniffing dogs can't detect all types of explosives.

Since TSA is okay with breaking the law (e.g. probable cause) why not take it all the way and profile passengers? And how about decent training for the airport pervs with attitude that do the groping? And most of all how about if Big Sister Napolitano recognizes that our concerns have merit instead of treating us like lab monkeys? Its a start.

Karen Zipdrive said...

I was so hoping Napolitano wouldn't turn out to be one of President Meekypant's knuckle dragging enforcers, but she is.
Her statements reminded me of something straight out of The Sopranos. Let me paraphrase what she said:
"Yo, if youse don't like da options dat we decided on for the airport security shit, nobody's forcin' youse guys to fly, capiche?"
I usually like big, oafish dykes like her, but not when they start being patsies for big business.
Her response was entirely abrupt and lacking in diplomacy.
I wonder which option she chooses when she travels?

bigsis said...

I thought it was very brave of Nopalito to submit to being nuked and releasing the results on the internet. Obviously the option she chooses when traveling is to keep a pistol tucked into her waistband above her flabby buttocks. Wise choice Janet.

Karen Zipdrive said...

Nopalito? HAHAHA. That's Spanish for cactus.
Sis, I think you're being generous to think that Janet is as slim as the woman in the picture.
Plus, I somehow doubt she trims her bush that neatly. She strikes me more as a wild snatch-thatch type.

nonnie9999 said...

wouldn't it be hilarious if everyone, when they're getting felt up by a tsa agent, did a 'when harry met sally' meg ryan-in-the-deli scene? everyone in line can yell out, 'i'll have what she's having!'

Dusty,Hells most vocal Bitch said...

and one wonders why the sudden introduction to these procedures without a big roll-out or even a governmental statement before the enhanced screening programs began. The folks at the TSA told that fucker Pistole to tell us prior to instituting this shit but that fuckwad decided to go against them. Bet his fuckwitted ass regrets it now.

Distributorcap said...

you can thank the fear mongering Adminstration (all of them) for this

lets get real - most Americans think terrorists are stupid and have a one dimensional way of thinking - bomb airplanes.

this is ALL smoke and mirrors. what is to stop anyone from walking onto a NYC subway or bus or a Mall in San Antonio or an Amtrak train or an office building or a movie theatre with a bomb and just leave it there to go off

it would inflict as much fear and damage as the plane - and is MUCH easier to accomplish. my turning in 4 ounces of shampoo becuse it is over the limit or taking off my shoes is not going to stop any terrorist. it is just a way for the nice HOmeland Security people (which is sounding more like the SA) to say we are really really protecting you.

this is a joke - but this is what you get when you choose to live your life from fear and complacency instead of action and activism. you want the govt to take care of you from the mean terrorists but you dont want the govt to check to see if you are putting in a bomb in your tampax or trojans UNLESS your name is mohammed and your have dark skin and kinky hair and pray 5x a day. those people shoujld be checked - but not us whities.

i agree with the tsa - you dont like the rules - they dont fly. take a train or a bus and wait until Osama bin Greyhound sets the bus plan in motion. it is a matter of time.

ps watch what happens when the first "incident" ona plane happens after a private pat down or massive dose of gamma rays. this is only the beginning of the magic show

Anonymous said...

Let me get this straight. We do not create an absolute uproar against the federal government when we find out that they torture prisoners, build secret prisons, and kill over 66,000 Iraqi civilians (according to our own Pentagon reports which we all know are very much understated) but we go crazy because somebody will see a shadow of our pee-pee?

That's what happens when Faux News determines our political debates!!! How sad.