Tuesday, February 02, 2010

Great News for Lesbians!

It turns out singer Amy Winehouse is bisexual.
Yep, not only does she share her sexy wares with men, she's also keen on occasional romps in the sack with the ladies.
I'll bet she's fierce, too.
How fun would it be to help her comb out that beehive, gently wipe the vomit off her heaving new breasts and behold her wild and woolly mound of Sapphic pleasure.
I'll bet she has the most amazing scent--a heady mixture of vodka, cigarettes, weed, blood, dirt and feminine secretions that have never been bruised by a harsh wash cloth, soap or water.
How lovely it would feel to have her jagged, dirty toenails rake against one's leg?
What's more, I'll bet Amy leaves slow, gentle loving to lesser goddesses. I'll bet she's rough. And bites. And scratches. And spits. And screams...and not in a good way.


nonnie9999 said...

i was thinking she probably falls asleep and has no idea who's doing her.

p.s. please boil her first, and yourself afterward if you dare to partake in the fabulous ms shithou...i mean winehouse.

Karen Zipdrive said...

Boiling might ignite the alcohol!
It would have to be a Hazmat suit, rubber boots and gloves, a face mask, a drum of Lysol and a 10 foot pole.

Fran said...

Oh shut up, I am laughing too hard for 6am!

There was an Amy Winehouse bit on Family Guy the other night... Amy Winehouse's hair was out, a big black wig and it was out doing all the things that Amy is known for, while a bald headed Amy was at home waiting.

When it finally came home she yelled at it and told it to get back where it belonged.

It went up her skirt.


Have I crossed a line here?

Karen Zipdrive said...

Crossed a line?
Have you read this blog before?

okjimm said...

Break me up!

bigsis said...

What a horrible thought. She'd flop things on you that water couldn't wash off.

Karen Zipdrive said...

Sis, forget water, she'd probably pass on enough external and internal diseases and parasites, a full body dip in penicillin and an array of STD innoculations would still probably leave you itchin' and twitchin.'
I'll bet even crab lice take one look at her and say, "Eeuuwww, too gross for me!"

nonnie9999 said...

that sounds like the routine wanda sykes does about the detachable vagina. it's hilarious!

Fran said...

nice pic!

HelenWheels said...

Ha ha ha ha ha ha ha haaaa!!!!! I nearly barfed up my breakfast, thank-you-very-much. The combo of this post and that picture put me over the edge.