Wednesday, February 16, 2005

The Bush Auction

I read in the NY Times that Caroline Kennedy recently authorized Sotheby's to auction off assorted Kennedy memorabilia and bric-a-brac, bringing in $1.7 million, or almost double what they expected to make.
I wonder if the Bush twins will one day auction off items from their parents estate?
I can only imagine what might be on the auction block...

• Dubya's Hooked on Fonix book, monogrammed with presidential seal
• Original copy, Dubya's DUI police report(s)
• Crack pipe, with assorted Bush DNA on mouthpiece
• Riding crop, used by Barbara Bush on Bush 41
• Original outhouse from the Crawford "Ranch"
• Dubya's cowboy boots-rarely used
• Dubya's Sperry Topsider yachting loafers, well worn
• 4,000 cases of empty Jim Beam bottles
• Dubya's roach clip, monogrammed with Texas map
• Various glass vials containing cocaine residue
• Dubya's complete personal library:
The Children's Illustrated Bible
Politix for Dummies
Grow Your Own Hydroponic Pot
Assorted Cliff's Notes
• Sammy Sosa's baseball bat, autographed with the inscription, "See ya around, dumb ass"
• Laura Bush cigarette case with Texas logo, pink patent leather, with partial pack of Newports inside
• Laura Bush Bic lighter, pink with Texas logo
• Assorted liquor flasks, including small ones belonging to the twins as children
• Various pill bottles, with Noelle Bush's name on the RX
• Neil Bush's savings and loan memorabilia, including matchbooks with, "get burnt, save with us" under the logo
• Various shot glasses, coasters, swizzle sticks and cocktail shakers, circa the twins' high school days
• Dubya's Master's thesis notes, written on cocktail napkins
• Dubya's National Guard uniforms, unused, still sealed in original plastic wrap

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