Friday, February 11, 2005

You're Fired!

The new book 'Fire Your Boss'(Harper Collins 2004) offers the following checklist for spotting impending termination. Below that is my interpretation of the warning signs.

Theirs:
You are asked to compile a report on all your ongoing projects.
You are pushed hard to finish one or two specific projects.
You are encouraged not to do your usual long-term planning.
You're neither informed of nor invited to meetings.
You receive a critical review for the first time.
Your expense reports are questioned.
Your typical expenditures are criticized.
Your direct superior keeps his or her distance from you.
Conversation stops when you enter a room.
You have a vague sense of unease.

Mine:
Your office has become a storage room for mops, brooms and restroom supplies.
You're asked to write a help wanted ad for your job description.
You find your pen chained to the desk.
Your desk calendar is suddenly missing all the pages after February.
Your computer is replaced with a Smith Corona manual typewriter and a used bottle of WiteOut.
The Muzak in your office keeps playing an instrumental version of, "Hit the Road, Jack."
You send your boss a memo and it comes back stamped, "WHATEVER."
Your office chair is replaced with an upside down 5-gallon plastic pickle bucket.
Your boss chuckles when you talk about your summer vacation plans.
Your office enemy brings you warm breakfast tacos on a Thursday morning.

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