Saturday, August 13, 2005


Resident Bush and his motorcade passed the growing camp of war protesters outside his ranch on Friday.
The resident passed by the protesters on a trip away from the ranch but did not stop.
To his credit, however, he refrained from rolling down the window to shoot the finger. Instead he was said to have made the vulgar gesture from behind the dark glass of his SUV limo.
He was on the way to a neighboring "ranch" to attend a $25,000 a plate barbecue fundraiser for the GOP.
The motorcade didn't stop because none of the protesters held out giant checks for the resident, who only "visits" with Americans who wish to donate thousands of dollars to him.
A high level Crawford official who spoke on conditions of anonymity said, "Dubya hadn't never seen no genuine protesters before and he got so derned het up, Laura had to search through her purse to find him a few Valium to go with the thermos of Jack Daniels he likes to keep in the car with him.
"Jenna, one of his twin daughters, offered to leave the SUV and 'go out and kick some Vacaville mama ass,' but the president declined her offer, saying she might stain her new Clint Black 'I Raq & I Roll' T-shirt."
On the return trip to his Crawford ranch following the barbecue, Bush was said to be passed out in the rear of the vehicle, so sources say he was not bothered again by the sight of the anti-American protesters.


The Educated Eclectic said...

Yep, DEFINITELY not enough money to warrant a visit by Dear Leader and his Stepford Wife...

Karen Zipdrive said...

Hell, people had to be pre-screened and pay to hear his damn stump speeches, and that was AFTER signing a loyalty oath.
Paranoid control freak, much?

Typical untreated dry drunk with a rich, prissy daddy and a mean, butch mama.