Thursday, May 11, 2006

Scathing Reviews for Dick's Lil' Tomboy's Book

For an entertaining read, check out http://www.amazon.com/gp/product/141652049X/sr=8-1/qid=1147360523/ref=sr_1_1/102-6349910-4950561?%5Fencoding=UTF8 and read the reviews of Mary Cheney's new booklet.
The few glowing reviews are by people who have only written this one review for Amazon.com- which of course leads one to believe they are just Bush & Dick lemmings doing their Lord's work.
I feel like going to my local Borders, picking up a few copies, then sitting in an alcove and autographing them with things like, "John Kerry can go fuck himself! Thanx for buying my book :) --Mary Cheney."
Former political dissident Abbie Hoffman once wrote a book called, "Steal This Book."
I think Abbie would love the idea of a few of us rebels defacing Mary's piece of crap and ruining the sales value.
Oh well...
At least Mary has finally put a face on butch-on-butch love.

9 comments:

Anonymous said...

Karen, have you written your review of Mary's book yet on Amazon? I probably don't need to remind you that your review of "Sisters" is still the "Most Helpful" of all. Amazon customers need to hear your voice. Don't deprive them!

Karen Zipdrive said...

Anything for you, my dear.
Here's a sneak preview of my book review for Amazon.com:

Take the Money and Run, May 11, 2006
Reviewer: Pulp Friction Reader "Karen Zipdrive" (Texas) -

Mary Cheney, the vice president's meek but butch lesbian daughter, has penned a booklet guaranteed to disgust both the radical fundamentalist neo-cons AND the gay community.
Realizing her daddy's political future is slighly more fragile than his mechanized heart, Ms. Cheney took the leap and wrote a book before the Neo-con Gravy Train ran dry.
The book's biggest revelation is Ms. Cheney mouthing her father's favorite phrase, "go fuck yourself" to John Kerry as he re-outed her during the great presidential debate between Kerry and Bush. How that must have scalded Mr. Kerry.
Ms. Cheney and her slightly hirsute partner have built a nice life for themselves, courtesy of Republican dollars. She failed, however, to mention the gala barbecues they host in their privacy fenced backyard, with such eligible bachelors in attendance as GOP Chair Ken Mehlman, pudgy but lovable Scotty McClellan and journalist Jeff Gannon Guckert.
Had she mentioned them, she could have kicked open the doors and revealed Melhman's recipe for Loose Loafers Ambrosia, McClellan's famous Vienna Sausages in creamy man sauce and Guckert's spicy pork butt.
Though Ms. Cheney's book contains plenty of other meaty non-issues, still she failed to upstage her mother Lynne Cheney's bodice-ripping, lesbian frontier thriller, "Sisters."
I urge all prurient, voyeuristic neo-cons and self loathing homosexuals to rush out and borrow Ms. Cheney's book.

Anonymous said...

Thank you Karen! Very nice!

Seriously, my side still hurts a little bit from laughing. I needed that! Now,... I don't want to taint the voting process but I'll have you know that my review is in the top ten of "Most Helpful" this go round. "You snooze, you lose!" Shoulda gotten that review of yours posted a bit earlier gal. Timing is everything on Amazon.

Karen Zipdrive said...

Penny, I looked but did not find your review. Please can you recap it here for us?

Karen Zipdrive said...

P.S. I still avoid all Coors beer products because they hired Mary Cheney to shill for them after they were outed as homophobe right wingers.
Fuck all those fucking fucks.

Anonymous said...

This was my first review, Karen. I used my "Pen Name" -

There should be negative stars in the rating system., May 10, 2006
Reviewer: Winnie Bago (DC, USA) - See all my reviews
If there were, I'd give this book -5!

For people like "ellen from bradenton," "Ted from Massachusetts," "P. O'James from California" and others, I DID read the book and I came to it with an open mind, willing to give Mary Cheney the benefit of the doubt without prejudging or forming an opinion beforehand.

********** IT WAS AWFUL! TRULY AWFUL! **********

It couldn't have been any worse if a committee consisting of Mary Matalin, Ken Mehlman and Karen Hughes had conspired and ghost written it completely, which I'm quite sure I'd have no trouble believing after all the lies Mary's father and his boss have told.

There IS one thing that was worse than reading Mary's book. That was tuning in to Larry King and listening to him interview Mary. Listening to her speak for herself makes me doubt Mary, Ken and Karen had anything to do with the book. Mary Cheney IS as boring as her book. This book IS her doing. She owns it! I seriously doubt anyone in their right mind would claim co-authorship.

===============================

I just tried to submit a more in-depth review, and Amazon didn't post it immediately. When I tried to post it, I noticed the delay time was changed from originally "will take up to one day" to "will take up to seven days" or something like that. I thought my new review was funny, but I have a warped sense of humor sometimes...

I hear you about Coors! I used to have an AOL account and when I heard Mary got her job there, I cancelled and when asked the reason, I told them because they hired Mary Cheney. That was the shortest phone call to AOL I ever had to endure.

Karen Zipdrive said...

Oh, Winnie Bago- I read that one. Very nice.
Send me your e-mail address, please. I'm at: KarenZipdrive@aol.com.

BigSis said...

Can someone please give me an "amen" on my comment about Mary Cheney actually being Dana Carvey in drag? She's a dead ringer for the church lady character.

Karen Zipdrive said...

Hey sister-I wanted to give you an amen but as I said earlier, Mary cleans up nicely and when you mentioned the church lady resemblance, I was aghast at the similarities.
Then I went into an emotional tailspin, worrying that I've descended into the stage where anyone under 50 looks kinda hot to me.
Yikes.