Friday, January 09, 2009

Enough Already

I was over at Kill this Character and D-Cap posted about the characters in the Sea Bond ads.
That got me to thinking, why are people over 50 getting their teeth whitened so much they look like they're wearing dentures?
I am not immune to the dictates of society myself- my dentist has brightened my teeth a little, but no so much that I can light up a room when I enter it.
But why must people like crusty old Ed McMahon overdo it?
Are we expected to believe a guy that old has maintained sheet white choppers for the last 80 years? Feh.
John McCain needed a little brightening, but not so much that he looks like he's in a Poligrip ad like Ed does.
People, by all means tell your dentists to do it, just don't overdo it. Okay?


Lulu Maude said...

Ed needs all the money he can make from endorsing stuff like that. Once in a while I see a story detailing his latest financial woes.

Life ain't been the same since Carson passed.

Cheshire-like, perhaps?

karenzipdrive said...

Ed has financial woes because he married a trophy wife who thought she was marrying into money.
If he thinks she'll stay with his broke ass just because he used to have a good job and plenty of money, he's crazy.
He needs to salvage what's left of his pride, dump her before she dumps him, liquidate whatever assets remain and rent himself a nice one bedroom in West Covina.
Then he needs to write a tell-all book about Carson and make up a lot of spicy lies about JC's sexual proclivities.

Lisa said...

I just laughed out loud at your tag for this post.

dguzman said...

I'm laughing at your suggestions of what Ed Hey-oh! McMahan needs to do to get back on track. BRILLIANT.

Dude, you need to be a life counselor or something--do me next, okay?

nonnie9999 said...

ed's wife won't leave him. he probably has some life insurance, so she'll stick around and throw banana peels in his path. have you seen that woman? she's a shrieking no-class harridan! she loves the spotlight, and, though old ed is not much of a magnet for attention, he is her only hope that she will get her ugly mug on celebrity versions of family feud. there are no other has-beens that would want to hook up with her (except maybe robert blake--i hear he's available, though i'm not sure how white his teeth are), so she will stick to old ed like a barnacle to an old ship. i bet she's already picking out the dress she'll wear on larry king's show when old ed kicks the bucket and larry does a retrospective of old ed's career.

bigsis said...

Put Regis Philbin and Lou Dobbs at the top of that dayglo teeth list.

Ed and his rat bastard side kick, Dick Clark, did a great job of enticing our mother and thousands of other elderly people into letting those Clearinghouse criminals dip into their checking accounts. Karma precludes me from wishing bad on this horrible man, but looks like the universe has taken care of the matter right here on earth.

karenzipdrive said...

Sis I forgot about how Ed and Dick were part of that sweepstakes racket.
Yeah, I think karma might well be handling their misdeeds. Dick had a major stroke and Ed...well, look at him.

Mauigirl said...

Yeah, my father was sucked into that whole Publishers Clearinghouse thing. I think his gullibility was the first sign of his Alzheimer's coming on.

I agree about the too-white teeth!

bigsis said...

Mauigirl, you're exactly right, most of the people Ed and Dick took advantage of had some level of Alzheimer's. Shame on them forever.

Greg said...

His teeth make my teeth hurt.

Distributorcap said...

white teeth get you out of mortgage default

GDAEman said...

Poor Ed.

Karen Zipdrive said...

Poor Ed, my ass.