Saturday, March 14, 2009

The Secret Diary of KarenZipdrive




I'm usually a Steady Freddie.
I know who I am and what I want and how to get it.
I have both feet on terra firma and my head is never anywhere near the clouds.
Then I got into the Interactive Media business.
In my last job, I was Vice President of Public Affairs for a new company that was supposed to be providing kiosks containing information that helped kids get into college.
I was well paid and my office was in a 5-star professional building with all the amenities. I wore fancy suits, make-up and earrings to work every day. I even carried a briefcase, with actual work in it.
The idea was magnificent and well received by educators everywhere.
The only fly in the ointment was, the CEO, COO and VP of Finance all were incompetent, greedy, sniveling liars who basically pissed away, absconded with or otherwise squandered almost a million dollars in investor funds.
The entire professional staff quit three weeks after they stopped paying us.
I haven't drawn a paycheck since January 15.
A normal person would just pick them self up, dust them self off, file for unemployment, then find a new job elsewhere.
But I never claimed to be normal.
Now I find myself working as a Managing Partner/Co-founder of a new Interactive Media business.
Sounds good, huh?
Trouble is, I don't know nuthin' 'bout birthin' no new companies.
My partners do, but I don't.
So, Steady Freddie is now Dready Betty.
The Universe has gifted me with Achilles' tendinitis in both ankles as a symbol that I'm afraid to move forward.
I know what needs to be done, but I needed to write this to get it out of my head so I can face the music, bite the bullet, get off the stick, get the lead out, rev up my engine, get a move on, and hit the ground running.
Ahh.
Much better.
Gotta go now, I have work to do.
Wish me a safe and painless labor. This fuckin' baby is gonna be huge.

14 comments:

Dr. Monkey Von Monkerstein said...

Good luck with all that.

two crows said...

well, while you're facing the music, biting the bullet, getting off the stick, getting the lead out, reving up your engine, getting a move on, and hitting the ground running, don't forget to stop and smell the flowers.
:)

nonnie9999 said...

karen,
i have faith that you will do just fine. you probably know more than you think you do about birthin' new companies, but you don't realize that you do, because you never birthed them before. common sense and intelligence can go a lot farther than just experience.

Karen Zipdrive said...

Thanks all.
It turns out I'm a whore for encouragement.
So sue me.

zoe said...

Double down on the epidural. You'll come through like a champ.

Pyzahn said...

Huge, huh? Well, I'm a marketing consultant looking for my next project. Whaddya got for me?

Lisa said...

I have no doubt that you're going to make it happen. You just seem like that kind of abnormal person ;-D

Seriously, though, good luck!

The other Lisa said...

Karen, you're a smart,articulate woman. If you can't make this work, no one can. Best wishes!
Lisa (the other Lisa)

HelenWheels said...

Best of luck, KZD. You're so smart and capable you don't have to worry. I have a very perfectionist side to me and I'm seeing that in you. When I first started the job I have now, I was a basket case because I didn't automatically know EVERYTHING on day 1. You have to realize no one does. Take the people's lead who have done this before then run with it.

AND you will also feel 100% better if you just do some googlin' and read up on starting companies, just to bone up on any jargon you might need to be familiar with so you sound like you know more than you may at this point.

Then, it will all just come together.

Go get 'em, tiger!!!

Karen Zipdrive said...

Pyzahn, wish I could help but I do what you do, so I'd have to fire myself to get you in and then we'd have a mess on our hands because I'd keep thinking I would be better at it than you, even if I wasn't.
That's just how I roll, baby.
But thanks for the offer, and thanks everyone else for the encouragement.
It really got me out of scaredycat mode. :*

Fran said...

I have a work philosophy-- no pay/no workie

That's how I roll!

If I have to do the corporate dance, they have to comp me. My mortgage holding bank seems to agree- they too are non negotiable on that item.

Good luck with all that.

Dusty said...

You should do fine KZ. Your small bit of apprehension is of course normal.

Go get em sweetcheeks! ;)

Oh, is your former company being brought up on any charges? They should be.

Karen Zipdrive said...

The former company is being hit on all sides by former employees and bilked investors. All told, they screwed us out of more than $80,000 in unpaid wages and bonuses.
They still owe me $11,000. You think I just walked away without so much as an apology?

dguzman said...

Make it happen, Zip.

I have spoken!