Thursday, March 12, 2009

The Top Secrit Dairy of Levi Johnston

March 12

Fuckin' A, I'm finaly free of those fuckin' Palin bitches!!!!
Words got out that me and Bristol have broke up and I am fuckin' free of dipers and baby shit and puke and all that shit.
That bitch Sarah and that pussy whip Todd rilly tryed to leen on me to marry Bristol but I kept sayin' wate till I get my jorneymans papers to be a electrisian so I could take care of them better. HA HA HA!!!
My boys an me rilly celebated after word got out.
Bucky brougt a case of old milwalkie and Moose brougt a ounce of some primo Matanuska Tundra Fuck and I stole some of my moms oxys she forgot she hid. Man we was all fucked up!!!!
The Palins had the nerve to ask me to give back the suits and shit they bought me for the convension, but I said yeh sure, like Sarah gave back all that fuckin clothes and shit they bought her. HA HA HA HA!
There is a little bad news tho. Willow called and said shes late on her period and I am sweatin my balls off about the shit. She fuckin BETTER NOT BE LATE.
I might oughta look into gettin a vastectomy at the rate I am goin' but I wont cuz I may want to meat a nice girl and settle down & shit oneday- and have a family with kids & all.
Them Palin bitches is all horny. Even the old lady ansered the door oneday wearing onley a towell & she was acting all surprized n' shit that I was at the fuckin' door.
She knew I was comin' over but she acted all surprized & shit. Sure she wuz.
I gotta go. Willow is texting my ass off, wantin' to meet me behind the old burnt out church again. She better fuckin' not be PG.


dguzman said...

Once again, you've proven you are the queen of getting access to idiots' diaries. Woodward and Bernstein got nothin' on you, Zip.

Gua said...

too funny!!!

Rick said...


Anonymous said...

nonnie9999 said...

lol!! i am in awe of your mind-reading abilities. lucky levi can regrow his mullet now. that is, if he isn't found run over by a fleet of snowmobiles.

Lisa said...

Does Levi know you accessed his online "private" stuff again?

Karen Zipdrive said...

Are you kidding, Lisa?
He sent it to me.

zoe said...

Better sentence construction than his almost mother in law. Here's hoping he keeps sending you the dope, Karen

kirby said...

No no, Zoe, it's his mom who deals the dope. Levi just likes "meatin' girls."

Katie Schwartz said...


Fran said...

I think Sara Palin was all about that shotgun wedding... but maybe Levi did the unthinkable----

Went & voted for Obama!


What a kick it would be, to see an Obama sticker on his truck, in the GOP Guvnah's mansion driveway.