Monday, June 29, 2009

Too Much Trash.



I'm shocked.
Usually I have extra large storage capacity for current events, but lately there's been just too much garbage to process.
--I think we all knew Michael Jackson was eccentric, frail, hypochondriac, abused and drug addicted. His death didn't really shock any of us, but what's been shocking is the incessant coverage and feigned shock about the gory details, as if Mother Teresa had died of a crack cocaine overdose.
Do we really need to know more about this pathetic, creepy character's personal life? Can't we just say a great performer died and stipulate to all the disgusting personal details we all know by heart by now?
--Mark Sanford is a hypocrite and creep. Cheaters rarely get caught on their first infidelity. Cheaters cheat; that's how they're hard wired. More women are slithering out of the woodwork now, saying Sanford screwed them, too. His wife's attitude tells the tale. She may say she wants to salvage their marriage, but her disgust is palpable. He epitomizes the phony family values Christian Southern political type, and he deserves to be put out to pasture.
--Bernie Madoff caught a 150-year sentence for being the slime ball of the century.
Don't Jewish people already catch enough shitty stereotyping about being cheap money grubbers without this putz exemplifying those hackneyed cliches? Just for that defamation-come-to-life, he should have caught another 50 years on his sentence.
Now his wife is saying she hopes he's swallowed up by the vultures of Hell. Sure, honey, you thought all that Beluga caviar and Crystal champagne on the assorted yachts tasted a little off, didn't you? And your darling sons were clueless, too? Riiiiight.
The real crime here was in the court letting her keep $2.6 million in cash after confiscating billions in cash and assets. Seems to me, $260 would have been more than several of Bernie's victims ended up with. Crime made her rich, now crime should leave her penniless. It's not like she ever worked for a living.
--Billy Mays died of an enlarged heart giving out, period. News vultures wanted oh so bad for his death to be caused by bumping his head on the airplane that blew two tires as it was landing.
--Poor Farrah Faucett. Her noble death was immediately eclipsed by Michael Jackson's ignoble death. Good thing she documented her struggles with cancer or we'd have been deprived of filler between the All Michael/All the time coverage.
--Ed McMahon's death was probably a relief to all after he pissed away millions on trophy wives and living beyond his means. As pitchman for a company that ripped off my elderly mother and thousands of other vulnerable old people in a sweepstakes sting, Ed can kiss my butt into eternity.
--David Carradine. I don't like dirty old perverts, alive or dead. Say what you will about his acting roles, but dying buck-naked in a Bangkok closet with one's hands and genitals trussed up like a goose is a fitting way for a kinky old codger to kick it.

All in all, recent current events news has been too thick and trashy even for a news whore like me. My head has been throbbing like it does when I hear club music that has neither beginning nor end.

I just want to watch HBO for a while.

9 comments:

Iain said...

So right. It's galling enough to see Wife Madoff be consoled with plenty of pensioners' cash to see her comfortable until death, but to know nothing will happen to the sons is obscene. Amazing what a confession, guilty plea and promise not to appeal will get you.

Fran said...

It's all too much.
I noticed I have "forgotten" to turn on the TV in the last few days.

dguzman said...

Brilliant.

I'm so glad I don't have TV so I don't have to be bombarded by this Level 5 shit-storm of celeb-death.

Dusty said...

I have to turn off the telly and I hate that. I miss any political news that might come out.

Sports it is! But wait!

Even sports has it's maudlin horseshit..Manny Ramirez comes back friday and the baseball world is all excited over this cheating bag o batshit showing us Manny's triple A at bats nightly and all that crap.

nonnie9999 said...

sitting through all that bullshit on msnbc was worth it just to hear that normie coleman lost his appeal (like he ever had any appeal at all) and will not take the case to the supremes. even though i'm home alone, i still gloated watching the asshole concede!

bigsis said...

Now I know why our bigbro watches nothing on tv but movies. I used to make fun of him for it, but now I see the wisdom of not getting involved in the lives of freaks.

kirby said...

Yeah, my husband and I were wondering this morning why his wife and sons aren't sharing a cell with him. She was trying to shuffle assets and junk around after he was caught, and she still gets to keep 2.5mill?

JimBob said...

Heard today that there are numerous civil suits pending against wife and sons...justice may still (kind of) prevail.

KZ-you say "dying buck-naked in a Bangkok closet with one's hands and genitals trussed up like a goose", like it's a bad thing.

:-P

Dusty said...

JimBob..that was the best line of the post dude!