Wednesday, September 30, 2009

Fads Come and Go

1975

2008

The guy who came up with the pet rock made his money in the first six months of the rock's release. He enjoyed a little surge in sales at Christmas time in 1975, but that was it. The fad only lasted that long.
Our nation's newest pet rock is Sarah Palin.
Her $7 million book deal will probably mark the beginning and end of her quest for riches.
Lecture circuit? Not so much.
Seems Palin signed up with a powerhouse booking service in Washington, DC that's asking $100,000 for Palin to give a speech.
Trouble is, nobody's asking.
Traditionally, universities and large corporations are the booking service's best clients. But an insider said universities tend to want liberal speakers or intellectuals, and corporations shy away from controversial speechmakers.
Palin, like George Bush, may possess a modicum of folksy charm, but she's not terribly bright, insightful or even interesting.
Her big debut speech to global investors in China was said to have been a bust: humorless and boring. Several people walked out midway, saying they had better things to do with their time.

Like the pet rock used to be, she's merely a conversation piece.

She's a fad. Flavor of the month. Flash in the pan.
She blew her political chances by being a quitter. Honestly, if running a state with fewer than a million residents was too hard for her, why would anyone think she'd be up to the task of holding any national political office?
Unlike the pet rock, she's actually able to talk. I'm pretty sure if one of those rocks could have talked back in the day, they would have sounded an awful lot like Palin.
So, let's not worry about Palin making any meteoric rise to political prominence.
She's played out, and that's why her book publisher rushed publication of her book. Like the pet rock guy, they wanted a surge in sales come Christmas time.
But if you wait, I'm sure you can get her book for just a few bucks when it lands on the bargain table of every American bookstore come next spring.

14 comments:

bigsis said...

Never underestimate the stupidity of the American public.

Randal Graves said...

I knew a guy who had a pet rock. Didn't someone market the Fart-In-A-Can, too?

okjimm said...

What? You're saying I should give away Sarah Palin for Christmas? Most of my friends would prefer a rock. (except maybe Brian. He's a little weird.)

HelenWheels said...

Ha ha ha ha haaaa!! I busted out laughing seeing the pet rock next to her pic before I even read one word. Brilliant! I think that's the best comparison anyone's made.

And I think you are exactly right about her book being rushed. Like Ann Coulter's books, it'll be in the bargain bin for $2.98 come April.

HA ha ha ha haaaa!

Karen Zipdrive said...

It'll be all I can do not to sneak in a big black marker and deface as many copies of her book as I can. Or maybe just rip the dust jacket just a tiny bit.
But that would be wrong.
Having really dirty, smudgy hands would also be wrong, but the truth is, sometimes my little hands get dirty.

HelenWheels said...

Ha ha ha haaa.... you're giving me ideas it's dangerous for me to have. I have an inner vandal that looks for just such opportunities to come out & play.

nonnie9999 said...

i was thinking the same thing when i heard her book was out. i don't want to be arrested and charged with vandalism (what if they made me buy the fucking book as punishment!!), but i was thinking some well-placed stickers that peel right off would be amusing. i also have a terrible habit of moving books that i don't like and hiding them behind others. probably some kind of syndrome.

Karen Zipdrive said...

Hmm...the thing about hiding books is it might make bookstore managers think the book is selling well so they should order more of them.
I know when I buy a new book, I often choose the one under the displayed copy because I think it's been less "handled."
An innocent tear in the dust jacket would be highly discouraging unless the book was put on sale.
So would the first page being dog-eared.
And let's not forget boogers.

Kvatch said...

She blew her political chances by being a quitter.

Indeed! Almost certainly like Huckabee and Edwards before her.

Karen Zipdrive said...

I think scumbags Huckabee and Edwards are statesmen compared to Palin.

Dusty said...

That cunt isn't even writing her own book! She has a religious wingnut ghost-writing it for her.

Rogue my ass..The publisher probably demanded it so that the reader could actually make sense of what they were reading.

nonnie9999 said...

zippy,
on the contrary, most of the big bookstores depend on their computers for inventory. they'll see less of her books being sold and won't order any more.

p.s. the magic verification word is quiting. how fitting that it quit before adding the second T.

Karen Zipdrive said...

Ooooh, Nonnie, I stand corrected!
Now the question is, where do you suggest hiding copies? Fiction? Fantasy?

Distributorcap said...

hide the books in the Russian lit section

the pet rock had more brains than Sarah - it knew to get out of the public eye when it was hot.

actually i hear that her book makes an excellent lining for cat boxes. so when i see them in the garbage i will make sure carlos can take a dump on it