Friday, August 09, 2002

Oh, My Bags Are Packed...

I flopped around all night, dreaming of pinging slot machines, cocktail waitresses wetting my whistle and guys in dark suits paying me stacks of hundred dollar bills.

But before I go, I have to talk about those idiot legislators in Florida who made a law that says before a woman gives a baby up for adoption, the father must be notified.
I can almost kind of see that, but the stupid part is, if she doesn't know who the father is, she has to place a notice in her local paper describing or identifying men who may have fathered their child. She also has to disclose when and where the baby was likely conceived.
How embarrassing and humiliating that would be. Picture this ad:

"At the Oasis Bar parking lot, on or around Feb. 3, I had sex with three men in three different vehicles. One was in a large blue truck, one was in a red SUV and another was in a brown Camaro or Mustang. The men were one tall Jamaican, one small Puerto Rican or Cuban named Louie and a skinny white guy with tattoos. If any of you want my baby before I give it up for adoption, call 1-800-SKANK HO.

Florida is quickly becoming the stupidest Southern state in the nation. I see the Bush intelligence gene is alive and well in the Governor's mansion.

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