Saturday, October 25, 2008

Sarah Palin, You're Under Arrest

Okay. I am a professional journalist, but grammar and punctuation have never been my strong suits. However, I do have a few grammatical pet peeves that annoy me more than fingernails scraping a blackboard.

Sarah Palin's grammar is atrocious. Her vocabulary and diction are just as horrid.

1. In her recent interview with Brian Williams, she said, "By his own admittance, Bill Ayres said..."
It's admission, you stupid cow.
2. She often says, "also too."
Also and too mean the same thing, you redundant cunt. Sherri Shepherd on 'The View' makes the same mistake. Stop it, bitches.
3. I've heard Palin say, "I should of..."
It's "I should have," you moronic ignoramus.
4. Though I haven't see her writing, I'd bet $100 she confuses "your" and "you're." For the last time- your is used like this: That is your problem. "You're" is a contraction, with an apostrophe that means "you are." "You're an asshole, Sarah Palin. As a handy hint, when deciding when to use 'your' or 'you're,' sound out the sentence using "you are." If it sounds right, then use the version with the contraction.
5. Droppin' the "g's." Hey, I drop my g's off "ing" words all the time. But if I were running for office, I'd pronounce them. The world is watching. It's not a time for folksy, lazy diction, you stupid fucking hick.
6. Here's a sample of Sarah Palin speaking extemporaneously, about her daughter's wedding: "Um,” Palin said, “hopefully before that. But Bristol turns 18 in a few days. That’s what we wanted her to wait for: 18 and a decision on her own about how she’s going to forward..." What the fuck? Why not just skip the "um" and say, "Once Bristol turns 18, she feels she'll be ready to make a decision about her wedding date."
7. From her interview with Katie Couric: "It's very important when you consider even national security issues with Russia as Putin rears his head and comes into the air space of the United States of America, where—where do they go?"
This sentence is so mangled, I can't figure out how to fix it.

Palin might have intelligence of some sort, but for a person who allegedly holds a degree in journalism, I cannot figure out how she got past basic English 101 and got into a journalism program.
America has had enough Bush and Quayle types who make all Americans sound like high school drop-outs. We do not need another leader who sounds like an idiot selected from the cast of "Hee Haw."
I've got nothing against small town America and folksiness, but goddamn it, we need leaders who can string a sentence together that actually makes sense.
Bush used up all the malopropisms alloted to Republican politicians. Joe Biden is currently holding the Democratic talking stick, but he's way behind Bush's record.
Sarah Palin needs to take her dumb ass back to Alaska where she can you betcha and darn tootin' those poor frozen bastards half to death.


Randal Graves said...

I don't know why your getting all upset about they're mistakes, sometimes their perfectly ligament specially when Putin rears ahead.

Karen Zipdrive said...

Dear Randal,
Thank you for stickin' a sharp pencil in my eye.
Your killin' me hear, also too I wish I could of deleted you're

themom said...

So true, so true! Only nine more days to endure this walking grammatical moron. (Ten at the most.) My next blog is going to be her use of the word "preconditions." She has no concept what the definition of the word happens to be. My arms aren't long enough to smack her!

HelenWheels said...

THANK YOU. I tend to be grammar-policey as well, and I just fucking CRINGE whenever Moosemeat opens her countrified yap.

AND I hate her nasally accent to boot.

I can't stand the use of "should of" either, it's one of my pet peeves.

Droppin' the "ING" is a huge offense and do we REALLY need another moron who says "nukular?"

karenzipdrive said...

OMG I forgot nukular.
That alone should be a Class B misdemeanor.

Anonymous said...

There are some really bright people who, when they speak, you can tell that their brains are moving too fast for their mouths.

Then you've got someone like Palin who wants to sound bright, but who simply doesn't have the vocabulary or working knowledge of grammar to pull it off.

She's not stupid, but she's not particularly intelligent either. She's the type of person who operates largely on instinct and an innate sense of how to manipulate people.

Also is verbal tic for her. And her sentence structures are horrendous. She's just like Bush - scripted, she's okay, off script - disaster.

HelenWheels said...

I always think of that stupid pageant girl who said "such as and The Iraq" whenever Sarah the Hick does one of her talk-arounds like the one you quoted.

Nukular's a big one because it stands to remind us that, truly, this ego-driven asshole is just the shrub in $8,000 fuck-me pumps.

karenzipdrive said...

I forgot another major one. Pundits-- is pronounced just as it's spelled.
pun DIT'

It is not PUNDINT, damn it.

HelenWheels said...

Maybe it's a freudian slip and she means to say "pun-DIDN'T"

Lulu Maude said...

Just watched a little interview D. Letterman did with Tina Fey on how she pulled her impression together. Very funny and insightful.

She did note Sarah P's relish for Rs and asked Seth Meyer (who wrote the skits) to work lots of 'em into her sketches.

I do wonder how she got through any journalism program. Her profs no doubt comforted themselves with the idea that she would be able to worm her way into any NFL locker room, that she wouldn't really write anything.

Of course, given the number of schools she attended, she probably adhered to the ancient wisdom about a moving target, etc.

Hail, Halls of Ivy!

Anonymous said...

Yo... Karen... Fugghedaboudit! Ay! Oh!

nonnie9999 said...

and what about capt underpants? every time he says waRshington, i cringe! it drives me nuts! and then there's cindy lou. exactly why does she want to change shoes with obama for a day? if she likes borrowed shoes, why doesn't she take up bowling?

FranIAm said...

I have many of the same issues with her, also too. (hah had to say that...)

I just watched something that made me think of rearing Russian heads.

Go ahead - have a look I think your gonna love it. I should of posted it on my blog.

And don't go all nooclear and get mad at me cause I put a link in my comment. Okay?

Mauigirl said...

You are so right - those grammatical mistakes drive me crazy. And you'd think a person in public life would have learned (or should I say "would of learned") how to speak extemporaneously.

Anonymous said...

Is she really as ignorant as she seems, or is she just playing up to her retard base? Either way, she should be ashamed.

Jess Wundrun said...

The Anchorage newspaper has endorsed Obama. So not everyone in Alaska are also too idiots.

karenzipdrive said...

Very interesting thing, last night at dinner my big sis (or maybe my middle sis) mentioned that she'd heard a tape of Sarah Palin during her Alaskan gubenatorial debate and her grammar and diction were both perfectly normal.
Do I think she intentionally dumbed it down to appeal to the ignorant GOP base who look upon proper grammar and diction as "elite"?
You betcha I do. ;)

HelenWheels said...

KZD: It's true. I saw it. Same running around talking points but not nearly as nonsensical, and none of the "ing" dropping, winking or "you betcha's".

I've been telling EVERYONE. She's a fucking fraud.

She still isn't very intelligent but like the shrub, she's smart enough to be a snake-oil salesperson.

dguzman said...

She's a tool... of the patriarchy.