Sarah Palin, You're Under Arrest
Okay. I am a professional journalist, but grammar and punctuation have never been my strong suits. However, I do have a few grammatical pet peeves that annoy me more than fingernails scraping a blackboard.
Sarah Palin's grammar is atrocious. Her vocabulary and diction are just as horrid.
1. In her recent interview with Brian Williams, she said, "By his own admittance, Bill Ayres said..."
It's admission, you stupid cow.
2. She often says, "also too."
Also and too mean the same thing, you redundant cunt. Sherri Shepherd on 'The View' makes the same mistake. Stop it, bitches.
3. I've heard Palin say, "I should of..."
It's "I should have," you moronic ignoramus.
4. Though I haven't see her writing, I'd bet $100 she confuses "your" and "you're." For the last time- your is used like this: That is your problem. "You're" is a contraction, with an apostrophe that means "you are." "You're an asshole, Sarah Palin. As a handy hint, when deciding when to use 'your' or 'you're,' sound out the sentence using "you are." If it sounds right, then use the version with the contraction.
5. Droppin' the "g's." Hey, I drop my g's off "ing" words all the time. But if I were running for office, I'd pronounce them. The world is watching. It's not a time for folksy, lazy diction, you stupid fucking hick.
6. Here's a sample of Sarah Palin speaking extemporaneously, about her daughter's wedding: "Um,” Palin said, “hopefully before that. But Bristol turns 18 in a few days. That’s what we wanted her to wait for: 18 and a decision on her own about how she’s going to forward..." What the fuck? Why not just skip the "um" and say, "Once Bristol turns 18, she feels she'll be ready to make a decision about her wedding date."
7. From her interview with Katie Couric: "It's very important when you consider even national security issues with Russia as Putin rears his head and comes into the air space of the United States of America, where—where do they go?"
This sentence is so mangled, I can't figure out how to fix it.
Palin might have intelligence of some sort, but for a person who allegedly holds a degree in journalism, I cannot figure out how she got past basic English 101 and got into a journalism program.
America has had enough Bush and Quayle types who make all Americans sound like high school drop-outs. We do not need another leader who sounds like an idiot selected from the cast of "Hee Haw."
I've got nothing against small town America and folksiness, but goddamn it, we need leaders who can string a sentence together that actually makes sense.
Bush used up all the malopropisms alloted to Republican politicians. Joe Biden is currently holding the Democratic talking stick, but he's way behind Bush's record.
Sarah Palin needs to take her dumb ass back to Alaska where she can you betcha and darn tootin' those poor frozen bastards half to death.