Tuesday, November 12, 2002

Sugar Free Jelly Bellies

I have found an alternative to real candy. Fake Jelly Bellies.
After a Greek "diet plate" (one tiny skewer of beef and a lot of lettuce) for dinner tonight, I found myself wanting more. More something.
I found sugar free Jelly Bellies and I am a believer.
I went to the grocery store after dinner to forage for tomorrow's meager sustenance.
I bought four ounces of salmon, four ounces of tilapia, 6 cremona mushrooms, 2 bananas, a small orange, 2 six packs of diet black cherry soda, two whole wheat bagels and some soap that smells like lemon grass. And those fabulous sugar free Jelly Bellies.
My culinary life is starting to look like that of a Tibetan monk's, except for the Jelly Bellies and black cherry soda.
I can't believe a dozen faux Jelly Bellies have made such an impact.
The grocery store I went to has a "diabetic section." It consists of cookies and jams that have no real sugar but tons of disguised sugar, so they are just about as bad. I read the labels and snorted in derision.
So far the only upside of this shit is that my pants are all loose now.
My fingertips look like pin cushions from all the glucose testing.
And I miss that Canuck. Like crazy.

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