Letting off Some Steam
Arggh. I am sick of my family.
My sister and brother in Austin are having a protracted battle about my extremely elderly mother's care, and they feel compelled to include me in every e-mail.
I finally had to haul off and send them a howler, which for those of you living in a cave and not reading the Harry Potter series, means a letter that when you open it, it screams so everyone within a city block can hear it. If you don't open it in a timely manner, it explodes and wreaks havoc.
My sister is a lawyer, meaning she has a doctorate in arguing, and my brother is an environmental scientist and avid birdwatcher, meaning he is incapable of communicating about emotional issues with other humans.
You can only imagine the e-mail.
I have another sister we adopted as an adult, and she drifts above the fray, healing the sick and looking innocent at all times. Bitch!
Mama will turn 90 in January. She is spoiled, hilarious, a little senile, totally hip and as demanding as JLo or Madonna. She's very cute, but a royal pantload.
She has outlived all but one sibling out of 13. Her baby sister, my Aunt Lily, is still alive but she's had a few strokes and won't outlast Mama. No way.
Mama comes to visit me clad in Banana Republic, Gap, Old Navy, Eddie Bauer and L.L. Bean togs, always with a jaunty little hat on and always wearing suede, leather or canvas skateboarder tennies to match her ensemble.
My sister the lawyer spoils her rotten, then acts aghast at Mama's brattiness.
I just want to get an occasional e-mail from my siblings saying hey how ya doin' instead of the latest chapter of Throw Mama from the Train.
My brother sent me a nice jpg pic of a painted bunting bird recently, and I was so relieved I actually sent him a thank you note.
These people are giving me a pain. I know now why grown adults run away to remote locations and don't leave forwarding addresses. Arrgggh.