Who Is More Girly?
The results are in!

Mary was our winner, only missing one correct answer. Look for her haiku blog soon.

The correct answers are:

1. Cher or Brett Butler?
Cher! Brett's a man, or at least she should be.

2. Bono or Chastity Bono?
Bono! Sensitivity galore. Chastity has become a large bull dagger. She wasn't even girly as a toddler. My gaydar went off when she was about 3.

3. Jamie Lee Curtis or Jodie Foster?
Jamie Lee! Jodie is pretty, but she couldn't help that. She's totally butch.

4. Amy Grant or Hugh Grant?
Amy Grant! She's so girly she farts marshmallow clouds.

5. Prince or Liza Minnelli?
Prince! Liza's a female female impersonator, married to a wax dummy of a queen.

6. Tootie or Natalie?
Tootie! Her breasts are huge bazoongas that could put out an eye. Natalie is butch, plain and simple. She just wears girl clothes to please her demanding Jewish mother.

7. Little Richard or Richard Simmons?
Almost a tie, but Richard Simmons and his hot pants win by a Lee's Press-On Nail.

8. Madonna or Elton John?
Elton John! I just know Madonna's packing, and all the motherhood and marriages on Earth won't make her girly.

9. Paul McCartney or Paula Cole?
Paul McCartney! Somewhere along the way, all his testosterone evaporated and now he's as tough as pudding. Even his facial wrinkles look doughy and soft. He's all girl!

10. Moby or Eminem?
Moby! He's a wonderful girl. Eminem is just a nasty little boy.