Last night I went to bed around 2 a.m., good and sleepy and ready for a long rest.
I live on a quiet street, so noise is rarely a problem.
Then I heard it. The pendejos who live in the squalid house two blocks away on the next street over were having another one of their drunken brawl/party nights.
Why would anyone, drunk or drugged, go into the middle of the street at 3 a.m. and have a screaming conversation?
Who cares? I called the cops.
"911, Police, fire or ambulance?
"What's the problem, ma'am?
"Um, a loud party."
"No, next block."
"You can hear a loud party from the next block?"
"Yes. It's in the 1900 block of _____."
"How do you know what block it is?"
"Same voices, same bass on the stereo, same direction as always."
"Are they having a fight?"
"No, they are just loud and drunk."
"Okay, we'll send someone out."
(the noise continues)
"911, may I help you?"
"Yes I'd like to report a woman screaming."
"Is she being beaten?"
"Sounds like it."
"No, in the 1900 block of ____"
"It's not a party?"
"Nooooo, it sounds like a very serious domestic dispute."
"We'll send someone right away."
Let this be a lesson. When the neighbors are partying their asses off and you call the cops, never say it's a party. Always say it's a domestic dispute right off the bat. Otherwise nothing happens.