You Know You're an Adult When...

I must be getting really old.
I am jonesing for a new vacuum cleaner. Not just any vacuum, I want a bagless, whirlwind HEPA filtered baby who'll suck up a bowling ball, or at least suck up the pennies I am always dropping on the carpeting.
I surfed the net last night looking for consumer information. Sears has a few nice (but expensive) ones, but Target has a really nice Eureka Whirlwind bagless for $130 bucks or so. It got 5 stars by consumers.
I have come out of denial about my cats being short-haired and therefore not too sheddy. To be honest, they shed enough fur to make pashmina shawls for everyone reading this. They sneeze and fur flies. It's starting to get on my sinus nerves, and I am not even allergic to kitties.

Speaking of fur, my best friend Anna's got this friend Ann who is richer than Tiger Woods. Honestly, she's Texas rich. She's got diamonds that could remove a car windshield. Her next door neighbor used to be actor Tommy Lee Jones, and she could buy and sell that old bastard.
So Ann gives Anna this mink vest for Christmas.
Only it's not mink it's faux fur.
Seems Ann went to Sam's Club and found these vests for $20 each. When the other Sam's shoppers saw the obviously rich Ann fondling the fakes, they started flocking around like vultures.
Ann's shopping gene went on high alert and she ended up gathering an armload of the mink-like garments and heaving them into her cart.
She ended up buying 20 of them that she converted to Christmas gifts.
Fortunately, I was not on Ann's Christmas list.
Fur vests always remind me of Sonny Bono during his "I Got You, Babe" days.
But Anna looks great in hers.