Martha, Such a Humanitarian
Ha! Last night I watched Martha Stewart Living, where her guest was a 13-year-old girl who had won a trip to Martha's show via the Make A Wish Foundation, where kids with terminal cancer get to make a final wish come true.
Martha was showing this adorable young teen girl how to make the perfect Easter cupcakes.
The girl almost got Martha's ideal measuring cup, made of handsome, brushed stainless steel jammed up in the blades of Martha's $950 Kitchen Aid mixer.
Then she iced her cupcake rather sloppily, with icing decidedly listing toward one side.
Then when she dipped it in white jimmies (aka sprinkles), some of them spilled haphazardly to the tabletop.
Martha had developed a facial tic by then, but still she smiled as if the cooties girl was a welcome addition to her show.
When Martha showed the girl how to flatten rare, imported fruit shaped jellies in sugar, then cut them into petal and leaf shaped designs, she was aghast when the girl failed to use the maximum surface of the flattened jellies for economy.
Then the girl created an asymmetrical, multi colored flower on her sloppily iced cupcake and Martha's face was red and sweaty by then.
Poor Martha, having to deal with a cancer ridden child of limited aesthetic sensibilities. It was almost too much for her to bear.
I liked her better when she didn't have to present a soft, approachable image. Her anal retentive bitch persona suits me just fine.