Wednesday, June 30, 2004

Bush Birthday Haiku

The Democratic Congressional Campaign Committee, the same folks who brought us Republican Survivor, are sponsoring a haiku contest to celebrate Bush's upcoming birthday. Here are my entries.

Dubya's Big Birthday
My gift to the Resident?
What Dick told Leahy

Hey George W
I have birthday gift for you
Fleas in Saddam's beard

May I bring a guest
to the Bush birthday party?
His name's Michael Moore

Mr. President?
Fahrenheit Nine Eleven
There's your birthday gift

Tuesday, June 29, 2004


Mileah made a great observation on her Whistling Lips Blog about that note Condi Rice gave Bush yesterday, where he wrote, "let freedom reign" at the bottom of it.
Seems Bush can't quite get his cliches straight. I believe the phrase is, "let freedom ring," based on an old song.
To be fair to Bush, there is a song called, "Let Freedom Reign," which he may have intentionally quoted.
In fact, in looking at the lyrics I can see some of his policies have indeed been set to music:
(source: the Hated & Proud Neo Nazi website

HATED AND PROUD "Let Freedom Reign"


You say that you’re proud to be working class,
and that we’ve all got to rise above
But you don’t care about your people’s heritage,
you put down the land we love
You run around in boots and braces
and you preach our rhetoric
Your mind is filled with propaganda,
full of leftist politics
The simple truth that you can’t see
is that you’ve got no right to claim being a skin
‘Cause your pride is somewhere else
not in the land you were brought up in

If you’re a red skin you’re red scum
For all of you, your time will come
If you’re a red skin you’re red scum
You’re our public enemy… number one

You go to all the socialist rallies,
arm in arm with the students and the queers
Living in your dream world
thinking that you’re gonna make a change
But the general public sees through you
They see how foolish you are
You can preach and demonstrate your shit
but it’s never gonna go far
We’ll never let our land be like China
Government rule with no human rights
You’re all filthy fucking traitors,
and all of you should be shot on sight


Drive all the red skins out of the scene
Because they don’t have a clue what being a true skin means
Take pride in yourself and pride in your land
Support your own nation don’t support the red hand


Credit AmericaBlog

Bush the Dancing Fool

Monday, June 28, 2004

Fahrenheit 911 Message Boards

Now that I've read some of the right-wing's take on the movie, I may have to take a new look at my political leanings. Here are some gems I found on AOL's message board.

"Micheal Moore is a fat slob profiting from death... oh i thought he condemed that"

(you ask) how is he (Moore) a communist??????? he is against everything that made this country what it is!!! if it was not for people standing up with "GUNS" and fighting for this country you wouldnt have the right to spew out all of the [exp. del.] ! you should do the world a favor and shoot yourself with an illegalloy owned gun!

It will never compare to a real movie like "The Passion" because Moore is not a real person. There is no way a lier like him can be a Christian.

Who cars about this, its not true, not good acting and poor script

I'm tired of fat, lazy, mouthy, opinionated a**holes, who think they know a better way to run the country. How about supporting the military, our President, and the firefighters and police officers who protect you every second of the day. Face it, if us meateaters weren't out there, you treehuggers would have been extinct a long time ago. Grow up, stop being a booger eater, get off your dead A** and stand behind this great country.
signed a veteran and career firefighter/paramedic

Would that be the democrat liars like Kerry that want .50+ gas tax? spend and tax and tax and spend democrats? I'm paying 84% of what I make now for democrat scum, now, to waste. I'll not give a penny more! You vote for them, you pay for MY share of the tax increase they vote for. I'm sure you can afford them, I cannot!!!!

We are at war. It was declared on 9-11-01. Just as war was declared on 12-7-41. To show such utter disrespect and dishonor for one's country, not just its president, is treason beyond any treacherous treason ever commited against our country, and it should be punished, rather than elevated to such a level. Moore is like an animal who is eating away at himself, rather than his enemies, the real threats. Only animals know better than to do that, unless they're caught in a trap they cannot get out of without knawing out of it. This is the Michael Moore we should all know- the animal caught in his own media trap, his own hell, trying to knaw his way out, using a "documentary of truth" as his teeth. I would think the only humane thing to do to this person is to send him to Iraq, set him down on the runway at Baghdad Intl. Airport, and tell him to start knawing...and running.

Anybody that would watch or even talk about Comrade Moores Movie should be deported, The dude is so ugly he makes puke look good We should be filming those that enter the theaters & when the movie is over put them on busses to the Airport with a one way passport
Dick Cheney: "Go Fuck Yourself"

While it's been years since I actually said "go fuck yourself" to anyone's face, I admit that profanity, including the word "fuck," has a comfortable place in my vocabulary.
But I don't use profanity when I am at work.
When the Bush administration promised to restore integrity to the White House, and used millions of dollars donated by Christian Fundamentalist cults to get elected, they held themselves up as "Christians doing God's work."
Appointed President George W. Bush had made his vow to "change the tone in Washington" a central part of his 2000 campaign, calling bipartisan cooperation "the challenge of our moment."
He said, "Our nation must rise above a house divided," in his victory speech in December 2000. "I know America wants reconciliation and unity. I know Americans want progress. And we will seize this moment and deliver."
Now that Cheney has whipped off his gossamer veil of Christianity and told Senator Patrick Leahy to go fuck himself during a Senate group photo session, one might think the Christian Fundies would have their undies in a bunch.
Seems the religious right can understand the pressure Cheney has been under.
His company Halliburton (and it is *his* company since they still pay him a huge annual salary) has been a thorn in his side since the Iraqi invasion. Seems a good company like Halliburton can't get $10 billion or so in no-bid, secret contracts without pests like Leahy wanting Dick to be more accountable.
When the Senate still uses archaic phrases like, "the chair recognizes the gentleman from Kentucky" and "the honorable Senator from New York's time is up," is that really a place where the presiding officer of the chamber should be telling his colleagues to go fuck themselves?
Cheney said to Fox News of the incident, "I think that a lot of my colleagues felt that what I had said badly needed to be said, that it was long overdue."

I think if you plan to boast about being a good Christian, and make that an elemental part of your candidacy, you might want to skip telling ranking members of the Senate to go fuck themselves.

I am neither a Senator nor a self-professed "good Christian," but even if I had the chance to tell Cheney to go fuck himself to his face, I wouldn't.
It's just not polite.
Handing Over Sovereignty to Iraq

Bush takes credit for bringing down the Saddam Hussein regime in Iraq, and Dick Cheney insisted the Americans would be greeted in Iraq as liberators.
I think it only proper that Bush and Dick present themselves in Iraq as sovereignty is handed back to the Iraqis.
I'd like to see them standing on a podium together in Baghdad, ready to shake hands with Iraq's new President Whatzisname and Prime Minister Whoozziz.
They insist the world is a safer place now that Saddam is gone. Let them prove it to us by personally showing us how safe Iraq has become now that it's a democracy.

Friday, June 25, 2004

Fahrenheit 911

It's hard to put into words how deeply this movie moved me, but I will say it was the most meaningful political documentary I have ever seen.
Being in Texas, one might think F-911 would receive a tepid response on opening day, but the 1:10 p.m. matinee was sold out when I arrived 40 minutes early to buy tickets.
The cashier said the first screening had already sold out earlier in the week. So had the 7:10 screening tonight, but she did say she had a few tickets left for the 4:10 and the 10:10 screenings later today.
Anna and I were not to be discouraged.
We had met at the theater after braving a driving rainstorm, so strong it rained sideways, blew her umbrella inside out and downed several huge tree limbs on my block. We both got soaked to the skin trying to enter the mall.
Still, the showing was filled to 95 percent capacity, so we used some bogus tickets we bought for another movie to gain entry behind the velvet ropes, then we scampered to the ladies room, doubled back and snuck into the packed theater that was screening F-911.
From the opening scenes to the final credits, I fought back tears of sadness, outrage, fear and hatred. So did many seated around us.
I saw Michael Moore's last documentary, "Bowling for Columbine," and while I agreed with his premise, I must admit I found the movie too filled with cheap shots and easy setups, making for a sort of ham-handed, overly editorialized film I did not find particularly compelling.
This film, however, went light on Moore's trademark "gotcha" scenes and instead let the audience watch the film's antagonists do their own talking. The audience was left to draw their own conclusions.
The only gratuitously silly scene was Moore riding around the Capitol in an ice cream truck, reading the Patriot Act over a loudspeaker to members of Congress, who had apparently approved the Act before reading it.
For the millions of us who collect daily anecdotal evidence that condemns the Bush administration, this film offers a neat package of Bush and his administration's myriad acts of treachery, their cavalier attitudes and their outright filthy lies that don't border on treason- they are treason.
Moore uses facts, gleaned from documents, from speeches and from other irrefutable sources to indict Bush and his administration.
They have lied.
They do serve special interests that are not only un-American, they are the interests of foreign countries, like Saudi Arabia. Yes, Bush has favored Saudi Arabia over America in many cases, and this film offers proof.
It is illegal in this nation to call for a president's assassination. Though that sort of anarchistic statement probably should remain illegal in spite of the First Amendment, this movie might inspire many to do just that.
But let's not encourage anyone to kill Bush. Enough people have died because of him.
Let's just vote him out in a landslide, and let him be banished into the life of shame and disgrace he's brought upon himself.
If you disliked Bush before seeing this movie, you'll leave the theater hating him.
But hate is wasted on a person of such stupidity and worthlessness.
Please, see the movie, then channel your anger and hatred toward removing this malignant, malevolent administration.
Any American who still has a soul should see it as soon as possible. Even those who support the Bush administration should see it, so they can arm themselves against what will be an onslaught of demands for them to justify their support of this contemptible band of traitors.
I bought tickets for the 10:10 showing tonight.
Some of it was too intense to wrap my brain around the first time.
See it and tell us what you thought.

Thursday, June 24, 2004

Bill Clinton on Larry King Live

Anna and I watched President Clinton on Larry King's show Thursday night and Anna said, during a commercial, "Isn't it nice to hear a president using correct grammar and proper pronunciation to discuss world events eloquently, without stammering or pausing or having trouble with words containing more than two syllables?"
When one compares Clinton to Bush, it's just a damn shame we are currently under the control of this moronic religious fanatic whose only loyalty is to the special interests who stuck him in the Oval Office as a hapless puppet to do their bidding.
God, I miss Bill Clinton.
We never knew how good things were in America until he left office and this idiotic bastard took over.
How much longer? Oh, the humanity.
Jack Ryan: A Republican Whose Family Values You Can Trust
(credit AMERICABlog for pertinent details)

Jack Ryan is running for a seat in the Senate as a Republican from Illinois. His website quote:

"The breakdown of the family over the past 35 years is one of the root causes of some of our
society's most intractable social problems--criminal activity, illegitimacy, and the cyclical nature of poverty. As an elected leader, my interest will be in promoting laws and educating people about the fundamental importance of the traditional family unit as the nucleus of our society."

Jack has been heartily endorsed by several GOP luminaries, the most notable being Dick Cheney who even emerged from his bunker at an undisclosed location to raise money for Ryan's race for Senate.

Jack's former wife, actress Jeri Ryan, stated in her divorce petition that she wanted out of the marriage because Jack kept dragging her to sex clubs in New York, New Orleans, Paris and elsewhere, wanting her to engage in sex in front of spectators and in sadomasochistic rituals involving cages and whips. In her statement, she said her ex husband told her that her crying while in the sex clubs "was a real turn off for him."

You think fellow Republicans would back away from this sadistic pervert, but they defend him for his behavior because it occurred "within the confines of his normal, heterosexual marriage."

Noted right-wing, antifeminist Phyllis Schlafly said, "she still supports Ryan because the charges are unproven and were made during a custody fight. 'Sure they're disturbing. They're unpleasant,' said Schlafly. 'But considering where they're coming from, I would wait for the proof before judging him.'

Jack Ryan has admitted his ex wife's allegations are factual, and in fact he made no effort to keep the divorce papers that contained the allegations sealed. He must be a mighty secure guy to let news like this get out without a fight.

So let's get this straight.
If you are a heterosexual, married candidate for the United States Senate, you can take your wife and the mother of your child to S&M sex clubs all over the world and demand she let you fuck her and use a whip on her, in a cage or on a bare mattress in an open cubicle, while strangers watch.

Conservative Republican Pundit Robert Novak said of Ryan's actions: "Jack Ryan, unlike Bill Clinton, did not commit adultery and did not lie."

Ryan said in his own defense, "The worst that can be said is I propositioned my wife in an inappropriate place. We had people elected to office who have done things that are much worse than that."

So, if I try to marry my girlfriend so we can legally engage in plain old fashioned, non-S&M lesbian intimacy in the privacy of our bedroom, we would be offending the sanctity of marriage that guys like Ryan have pledged to protect?
And if Bill Clinton got a few blowjobs from Monica Lewinsky in the privacy of his office, that was worse than him dragging Hillary to S&M clubs and expecting her to let him fuck her in a cage, while people watched?

Can you believe the double standards these perverted GOP freaks have?
It just gets more and more unbelievable.
Abu Grrrrr...

Yesterday on "The Daily Show," Jon Stewart ran a clip of George Bush talking about the Iraqi prison torture scandal. Bush pronounced it, "the Abu Ger-eff (long pause) ...situation."
Considering how many times we have all heard the term Abu Ghraib pronounced, one might think the president could manage to put the syllables "grr" and "raib" together to form the word "ghraib."
Why can't he pronounce it?
Because he just doesn't give a shit, that's why.
He's the president of the free world, he doesn't have to give a shit.
He has a memo saying he didn't have to give a shit.
Congress and the Senate are Republican-dominated, and they say he doesn't have to give a shit.

I'm sure if he had his druthers, he'd just as soon drop a newculer missile on Abu Gereff.

And speaking of that memo, I loved how Rumsfeld wrote at the bottom, with regard to prison guards being allowed to keep detainees standing up for up to four hours at a time, "Why only 4 hours? I think 8-12 hours would be acceptable."
Bush said he couldn't remember seeing any memo that advised him he could ignore the Geneva Conventions with regard to prison torture. He also forgot signing the botton of the memo, acknowledging that he'd read it.
AK47 Assault Rifle or TEC-9 Assault Pistol? Decisions, Decisions

In September, when Bush lifts the 10-year ban off assault weapons, I am torn between which weapon to buy.
While I love the style and power of an AK47 assault rifle, the pistol would fit in a purse or tote and be easier to carry into situations where a hidden weapon might be to my advantage. Plus, I think a TEC-9 is so much more feminine than an AK47.
Now that the NRA has drawn the line and said any politician who defied their desire to see the assault weapons ban lifted would be denied their coveted "A" endorsement, we know President Bush backs them.
Yep, the president is all about protecting us, so that's why he's making it possible for everyone in America to arm themselves with assault weaponry, without all those pesky background checks and waiting periods.
I know any old gun would provide me basic protection in my car, home and office, but these days one never knows when one might be attacked by multiple assailants. I feel the need for some weaponry that will cut down a dozen or more at a time, so I can rest assured I'm sufficiently protected in any contingency.
The advantages of a rifle over a pistol, however, are tempting.
I wouldn't mind having a few bells and whistles like a grenade launcher or a bayonet on my primary weapon, just in case I need to clear out advancing assailants, or engage in a little mano a mano with some neighborhood Taliban or Al Qaida son of a bitches who mistake me for a defenseless, middle aged woman.
I am so looking forward to the ban lift in September.
With all the tax relief President Bush has given us, I may just buy the TEC-9 AND the AK47.
After all, a gal can't be too safe.

Wednesday, June 23, 2004

FREE! Get your FREE Fahrenheit 911 DVD or Video Here!

Okay. I lied again to get hits, but this will be a Blog about Michael Moore's new movie, "Fahrenheit 911," so it wasn't that big of a lie.
It opens Friday and my best friend Anna and I plan to go to the first showing at 1 p.m., then I'll go again with Eclair Friday evening if it's good.
From the trailer I saw, it looked like more of a straightforward documentary than some of Moore's previous movies.
From the trailer, just watching Bush in action without anyone's commentary was enough to make me grit my teeth. His arrogance apparently blossoms in this movie.
So many Bush apologists already are calling F911 a totally fabricated piece of junk. Have they seen it? No, but that never stopped the GOP from passing judgment before they bothered to look into things.
They made sure it was rated R to keep kids out. So? Kids can't vote, so what's the difference?
All I can say is, the movie must have hit some bullseyes because a lot of GOP and other rightwing fanatics seem pretty pissed off about it. Perhaps the movie contains information they don't want us to know?
Who else is planning to see it this week? Talk to me.
The Bike Wreck

As I was tooling up my driveway today with my bike baskets filled with ingredients for Thai steak salad, I spied a delivery from Sierra Trading Post on my porch, just as my next door neighbor Carmen asked how I was doing.
Knowing the delivery contained my cool new boots was almost enough to knock me off my bike, and Carmen's question further distracted me, but what actually got me was my bike's front tire hitting the gap between my driveway and the lawn and flipping itself over.
Falling to the right, I landed on my right knee and my palms, then the impact put me flat on my belly.
Fortunately, the thought of opening the package made me overlook the crash long enough to limp into the house, scamper to the front door and retrieve the new boots.
By the time I redid the laces so they'd be even and slipped them on, my knee had stopped hurting and my palms turned out to be only slightly abraded.
So what if the boots are a little on the butch side? Come this winter, I'll be the envy of anyone who ever wanted to run off and join the French Foreign Legion. And if Bush were to get reelected (le chance gras) I may really need them.
As for the tragic accident, I'm sure Eclair will be happy to soothe my wounds tonight...after she eats some of that Thai Steak salad.
See Beheading Video Here

Okay, I lied- I just wanted to get some Google hits to compensate for losing readers after a few days off from Blogging.
Maybe I should throw in:

More Abu Ghraib torture photos
Janet Jackson's exposed breast
Mary-Kate Olsen's eating disorder
Kobe Bryant accuser's text messages revealed
Sex video of Jessica Simpson and Nick Lachey
Huge, naked breast photos
Another boy claims sex with Michael Jackson
Monica Lewinsky and Bill Clinton
Fire Rumsfeld
Fire Ashcroft
Impeach Bush
Reagan's casket photo
Hot lesbian action photos

That should do it.
Break Is Over: Back to Trying to Lick Bush

My Blogging break was not all that mysterious.
I spent the weekend with my elderly mother at her house north of Austin because her 24/7 nurse was off for the weekend.
Then I spent the last few days recovering from showing a 91-year-old how to paint birdhouses. She's a very cute, sweet little old lady, but geriatrics service requires patience beyond my grasp. It takes some serious recovery time afterwards.

Back to reality...
In catching up with literally hundreds of news stories I get via e-mail, I was pleased to see Bush and his crowd of criminals gained no ground in virtually any sphere of influence.
His ratings in the polls show promise. Never has an incumbent with this low of ratings been reelected.
I haven't read many Blogs lately, so forgive me if this has been mentioned before, but did anyone notice how the Saudis reacted to the beheading of the American helicopter mechanic Paul Johnson? Within hours, they tracked down and killed Johnson's executioners.
Perhaps Bush could request an audience with his bosses in the Saudi royal family and get some tips on finding Bin Laden and other Al Qaida members he can't seem to locate.
Oh, wait. Of the 19 terrorists who struck on 9/11, some 15 were Saudi Arabians. Bush still hasn't addressed that little peculiarity with our Saudi "allies," now has he?

Saturday, June 19, 2004

Nothing to see here, y'all go on about your business...

Pulp Friction will return soon.
Feel free to talk among yourselves in the comments box.
And please note that I didn't use the word "amongst," which is proper only when old pals get together to speak Old English...or quote from Beowulf.

Thursday, June 17, 2004

I Got the Express Lane Blues

I ride my bike to the grocery store almost every weekday.
It's only about a half mile away and I have baskets on my bike that only carry so much, so I make lots of trips for just a few items at a time.
As such, I always use the Express Lane, where a big sign calls for 10 items or less. Not everyone observes the sign. In fact, hardly anyone observes it anymore.

I fear that one day, I will awaken in a cranky mood.
The morning news will contain yet another Bush turd that will make me even crankier.
Then, maybe that same morning, one of my cats will puke on my bed, or some other little crisis will happen to push me even further toward the edge.
To take the edge off, I'll think a quick bike ride to the store might help.
Then I'll pick out a bagel and maybe an apple, and get into the Express Lane behind someone who thinks 47 items are close enough to 10 items to not count as a lane violation.
Then he'll ask the cashier to go to the other side of the store to get him a pack of cigarettes, which will take another five minutes.
Then he'll borrow a pen to write a check, but the cashier's pen is missing so she'll have to find him another. Then he won't have his ID on him, so he'll have to run out to his car to get it.
By then, someone will crowd in line behind me with 40 items in her cart, and a screaming toddler bumping said cart into my ass. If I glare, the kid will cry louder and the mother, who has peroxided hair, a gold tooth and a teardrop tattooed in the corner of one eye, will start to glare back at me and say, "And? AND?"

Then it will happen. My head will explode.

Grocery stores need to either take down Express Lanes or enforce the 10 item maximum.
Or, wait.
Someone needs to invent a gizmo that counts the items on the conveyer belt and if they exceed 10, the inconsiderate shopper who cannot count to 10 gets sprayed with a fluorescent goo that smells like the dumpster behind a discount sushi restaurant in Vegas.
Now that I have big muscles from working out three times a week, I worry that my tendency to get easily annoyed will merge with my newfound ability to be able to knock over annoying people if I want.
I mean, I have no police record, I look like a respectable middle aged woman, I wear glasses, and who on a jury would convict me for kicking someone's ass if they willingly violated the 10 items rule?
I think I could get by with it. Would anyone blame me?

Wednesday, June 16, 2004

Conniving Liars and the Dirty Lies They Tell

Dick Cheney:
· Oct. 10, 2003: "[Saddam Hussein] had an established relationship with al-Qaida, providing training to al-Qaida members in the areas of poisons, gases, making conventional bombs."
· June 14, 2004: "[Saddam] was a patron of terrorism. He had long established ties with al-Qaida."

George W. Bush:
Sept. 17, 2003: "We've had no evidence that Saddam Hussein was involved with Sept. 11... There's no question that [he] had al-Qaida ties."

From the 9/11 Commission Report:
"There have been reports that contacts between Iraq and al-Qaida also occurred after bin Laden had returned to Afghanistan, but they do not appear to have resulted in a collaborative relationship. Two senior bin Laden associates have adamantly denied that any ties existed between al-Qaida and Iraq. We have no credible evidence that Iraq and al-Qaida cooperated on attacks against the United States."

What else has to happen and who else has to discredit this administration before people start to get that our nation is being ruled by liars and thieves?
Anyone who can still support Bush at this stage is, simply put, an idiot.

Lakers Lose!

Congratulations to the Motown Pistons for taking the NBA title and defeating the most sickening, arrogant bunch of clowns in the league. Without a single superstar on their team, the Pistons made the overpaid, overexposed Lakers look like what they are: players who are all played out.
Pistons coach Larry Brown used to be the Spurs coach. He's a nice guy who deserved a ring.
Karl Malone proved once again, cheaters never prosper.
Shaq: you're a big fat tub o' goo.
Kobe Bryant: hard to play with your rape trial on your mind?
As for Phil Jackson, give it up, Zen-Boy.

Tuesday, June 15, 2004

Swing State Scare Tactics

Yesterday, Pentecostal Conservative Attorney General John Ashcroft made a big deal about announcing an indictment against a Somali immigrant who is alleged to have plans to blow up an Ohio shopping center.
Let's just cut to the chase.
The Bush clan has successfully used scare tactics in the past to win approval of their secret plans to "eradicate terrorists" and to get contributions and votes. They have lied in the past to further their goals. Think WMDs in Iraq.
The trouble with liars is, once they lie it casts aspersions on everything they say from that point.
Ohio is a swing state.
Coincidence? You decide.

Monday, June 14, 2004

They're Reading Glasses

My girlfriend Eclair wears glasses when she reads.
She has a face that looks pretty good in most styles of eyewear, unlike me, who looks like hell in all glasses except for approximately three pair per 10,000.
Because she needs glasses just to see up close, she can buy those cheap ones you see in Walgreen's or Dollar Stores.
Not me, my unlined bifocals with the flexible stems cost about $350 a pair, and I still have to take them off to read because the bifocal reading part is about the size of a toenail clipping.
Because she is absent minded, she loses pair after pair of reading glasses, more than I lose those little white workout socks, with the gray toes and heels.
I put a dozen assorted pairs of reading glasses in her Easter basket, which she deeply appreciated, considering they cost me nearly $13.
She's down to about six pair now, one of which doesn't count because they make her look like she's old and buggy eyed and I can't stand to see them on her.
Eclair is neat and tidy. She puts things away, she sweeps, she dusts, she hangs her clothes and puts her shoes in reasonable places. Her car is spotless and her yard is, too.
What she does not excel in is dishwashing.
She has a dishwasher, but she thinks it wastes too much water and electricity to run.
This weekend as we were plating up dinner, one of the plates she pulled from the cabinet had a swash of something on it that looked like someone wiped a ham and mayo sandwich over it and let it air dry.
Then the knife I pulled from the drawer to slice the chicken was pocked with what looked like dried watermelon fibers.
I said, "Sweetie, do you wear your glasses when you wash dishes?"
She said, "No, they are reading glasses, not dishwashing glasses."
I said, "Some of the ones I put in your Easter basket said they were dishwashing glasses."
She said, "None of the tags said that, you are lying."
I said, "No, I think I recall seeing tags that said 'SPECIFICALLY FOR DISHWASHING.'
She said, "Maybe you should wash all the dishes, since you see so well you can even see things that aren't there."
I said, "I think you may intentionally be doing a crappy job on the dishes either to poison me or so I'll start doing all the dishes all the time."
She said, "Why would I poison you? I have no insurance policy on you."
I said, "Then you are doing this so I'll wash all the dishes all the time."
She said, "Okay."
Then she smiled her big, radiant, toothy smile at me and crinkled her eyes the way she does when she's trying to make me give in.
I told her the cat bowls that didn't get clean enough might end up poisoning her cats.
Now that concerned her.
She sighed and said, "Okay, I will start wearing my glasses to wash dishes."
Later that day, she proceeded to wash another sinkful without wearing her glasses.

I just hope she wears them when she's looking up the number for the ambulance, for that time when I finally succumb to toxic fork syndrome.
Bend Over Again, Barcodie, This May Sting a Little

I find it highly interesting that citizens like my political nemesis Barcodie insist that George W. Bush is doing such a great job ensuring our national security, when people like these clearly disagree.
Perhaps these men, from both political parties, need Barcodie to gather data from some of his favorite Blogs to enlighten them (he doesn't believe in the media except for Fox News).
Barcodie- could it possibly be these non-postal workers have certain acumen and information you don't?

WASHINGTON — A group of 26 former senior diplomats and military officials, several appointed to key positions by Republican Presidents Ronald Reagan and George H.W. Bush, plans to issue a joint statement this week arguing that President George W. Bush has damaged America's national security and should be defeated in November.
Twenty-six former diplomats and military officials, including many who served in Republican administrations, have a signed a statement calling for the defeat of President Bush in November. Their names and some of the posts they have held are:
Avis T. Bohlen — assistant secretary of State for arms control, 1999-2002; deputy assistant secretary of State for European affairs 1989-1991.
Retired Adm. William J. Crowe Jr. — chairman, President's Foreign Intelligence Advisory Committee, 1993-94; ambassador to Britain, 1993-97; chairman of the Joint Chiefs of Staff, 1985-89.
Jeffrey S. Davidow — ambassador to Mexico, 1998-2002; assistant secretary of State for Inter-American Affairs, 1996
William A. DePree — ambassador to Bangladesh, 1987-1990.
Donald B. Easum — ambassador to Nigeria, 1975-79.
Charles W. Freeman Jr. — assistant secretary of Defense, International Security Affairs, 1993-94; ambassador to Saudi Arabia, 1989-1992.
William C. Harrop — ambassador to Israel, 1991-93; ambassador to Zaire, 1987-1991.
Arthur A. Hartman — ambassador to the Soviet Union, 1981-87; ambassador to France, 1977-1981.
Retired Marine Gen. Joseph P. Hoar — commander in chief of U.S. Central Command, overseeing forces in the Middle East, 1991-94; deputy chief of staff, Marine Corps, 1990-94.
H. Allen Holmes — assistant secretary of Defense for special operations, 1993-99; assistant secretary of State for politico-military affairs, 1986-89.
Robert V. Keeley — ambassador to Greece, 1985-89; ambassador to Zimbabwe, 1980-84.
Samuel W. Lewis — director of State Department policy and planning, 1993-94; ambassador to Israel, 1977-1985.
Princeton N. Lyman — assistant secretary of State for International Organization Affairs, 1995-98; ambassador to South Africa, 1992-95.
Jack F. Matlock Jr. — ambassador to the Soviet Union, 1987-1991; director for European and Soviet Affairs, National Security Council, 1983-86; ambassador to Czechoslovakia, 1981-83.
Donald F. McHenry — ambassador to the United Nations, 1979-1981.
Retired Air Force Gen. Merrill A. McPeak — chief of staff, U.S. Air Force, 1990-94.
George E. Moose — assistant secretary of State for African affairs, 1993-97; ambassador to Senegal, 1988-91.
David D. Newsom — acting secretary of State, 1980; undersecretary of State for political affairs, 1978-1981; ambassador to Indonesia, 1973-77
Phyllis E. Oakley — assistant secretary of State for intelligence and research, 1997-99.
James Daniel Phillips — ambassador to the Republic of Congo, 1990-93; ambassador to Burundi, 1986-1990.
John E. Reinhardt — professor of political science, University of Vermont, 1987-91; ambassador to Nigeria, 1971-75.
Retired Air Force Gen. William Y. Smith — deputy commander in chief, U.S. European Command, 1981-83.
Ronald I. Spiers — undersecretary-general of the United Nations for Political Affairs, 1989-1992; ambassador to Pakistan, 1981-83.
Michael Sterner — deputy assistant secretary of State for Near East affairs, 1977-1981; ambassador to the United Arab Emirates, 1974-76.
Retired Adm. Stansfield Turner — director of the Central Intelligence Agency, 1977-1981.
Alexander F. Watson — assistant secretary of State for Inter-American affairs, 1993-96; deputy permanent representative to the U.N., 1989-1993.

One has to wonder how many people have to come out against Bush 43 before the terminally close-minded experience enlightenment.
My only question is, what size Kerry T-shirt will Barcodie need come November?

Friday, June 11, 2004

The Funeral

I was never a Reaganite and I can mention dozens of reasons why, but as a former president of the United States, I think he deserved a lavish state funeral. The price tag doesn't concern me.
Why? Because when presidents like Carter and Clinton die, I will feel a loss and would expect the same level of funeral for them.
I watched most of Reagan's funeral and thought it was a beautiful ceremony.
I felt sad for his widow.
Clearly she loved him, he was a good husband to her and I can respect that. For her to be his primary caretaker over the last decade was a huge credit to her.
I heard the eulogies, and as I expected, George W. read his haltingly and smirked between sentences, as if to be expecting praise for how he was doing. Clearly, no circumstances warrant anything close to heartfelt emotion from him.
I think he has attention deficit disorder, as evidenced by his squirming, fidgeting and looking around during the ceremony. All that drinking seems to have disturbed his central nervous system. I honestly think he has an organic brain problem, no sarcasm intended.
Anyway, the Reagans had that show business flair, and the funeral reflected it nicely. Good for Nancy and her kids.
Now Nancy is free to lobby for stem cell research.
I wish her well in her new calling, and I hope she can influence the president to look at the science before he closes his mind to it because of his simplistic, religious-based aversion to it.
Bush has enjoyed a slight bump in the polls because a major Republican died, but that will die down soon enough when the news returns to unresolved prison torture issues, the Plame CIA case and the rest of the many problems created by this administration.
Reagan's death may have given Bush & clan a brief respite, but soon they'll be under the magnifying glass again and have to account for themselves.
They can run but they can't hide, no matter who dies.

Thursday, June 10, 2004

Why I Tolerate Barcodie

Following is an e-mail written to me by my political nemesis, Barcodie.
When I told him I was looking for a pink Kerry T-shirt with a feather boa for him to wear on his Blog after he lost our (first) bet about Bush being thrown from office, I think he went into a panic.
I loved the part about "the booming economy." Priceless!
Good that it's booming- he'll need to cough up $100 when he loses our second bet.
(Note: I left his text unedited)

"Karen, you should realize that the Democrats are at their high tide line right now. The economy is booming, and no matter how much the liberal media may lie about it and say "Who are you going to believe, me or your lying eyes?" the public will eventually see that things are improving. Even Goebbels couldn't keep up the Big Lie forever. The Iraq situation is stabilizing and getting better (for Republicans and patriotic Americans, worse for Democrats) every day. Read that Wolflowitz article about the transition on my blog. Read it and WEEP, because it shows the plan that will lead to Iraqi sovereignty by the end of this month, and a reduced American security profile as we enable the Iraqis to defend themselves against the enemies of democracy. All of this will cut the ground right out from under Kerry's feet by this fall. I'm telling you now: The election will not even be close. Bush will get somewhere in the neighborhood of 55% of the popular vote, and will win a clear majority in the electoral college. Save this so that you can refer to it after the election, even if only to say, "He only got 53%, so you're an idiot!" or whatever other caustic tomfoolery you might hazard at that time."

Jeeze. If it weren't so pathetic, I'd be laughing out loud.
Bush is Reagan II?

Please. The Bush clan needs to stop feeding off the remains of Reagan's dubious legacy.
Dubya is no Reagan. He's not even a George H.W. Bush.
The Reagans all thought George W. was a turd.
Here's what Ron Jr. said last year in a Salon interview (thanks to BlogAmerica for the excerpt).

"The Bush people have no right to speak for my father, particularly because of the position he's in now," he said during a recent interview with Salon. "Yes, some of the current policies are an extension of the '80s. But the overall thrust of this administration is not my father's -- these people are overly reaching, overly aggressive, overly secretive, and just plain corrupt. I don't trust these people."

"The big elephant sitting in the corner is that George W. Bush is simply unqualified for the job... What's his accomplishment? That he's no longer an obnoxious drunk?"

"Sure, he wasn't a technocrat like Clinton. But my father was a man -- that's the difference between him and Bush. To paraphrase Jack Palance, my father crapped bigger ones than George Bush."

"Nine-11 gave the Bush people carte blanche to carry out their extreme agenda -- and they didn't hesitate for a moment to use it. I mean, by 9/12 Rumsfeld was saying, 'Let's hit Iraq.' They've used the war on terror to justify everything from tax cuts to Alaska oil drilling."

"And the weapons of mass destruction? Whatever happened to them? I'm sure we'll find some," he laughs. "They're being flown in right now in a C-130. There were, and will be, a lot of people killed over there. And if you don't care about the Iraqi casualties, what about the American? We stand to lose more people in the next months of occupation than we lost in the weeks of war. One of the reasons we escaped largely unscathed so far was because our military moved so fast. But now we're sitting targets -- we have to establish bases, patrol the streets, guard checkpoints. We're sitting targets for suicide bombers and other terrorists."

"And they told us, 'Don't worry about W. not knowing anything, good old Dick Cheney will be his minder.' Dick Cheney? And this was going to be compassionate conservatism? Dick Cheney is to the right of Genghis Khan, he wants to drill in your backyard, he wants to deny black people their rights --it was all there in his voting record for us to see. What were we, rubes?"

Wednesday, June 09, 2004

Fun Facts About John Ashcroft

We all know John Ashcroft used $8,000 of our tax dollars to drape the breasts of a bronze statue in the Great Hall of the Justice Department, but there's so much more to the man than some may realize.

Missourians made him the first senator ever to be defeated by a dead man. Late governor Mel Carnahan, riding an eleventh-hour surge of St. Louis city votes, led Ashcroft 50-49 percent with 86 percent of precincts reporting. Major news organizations nationwide were calling the race for Carnahan. Mel Carnahan died in a plane wreck while campaigning on Oct. 16. Roger Wilson, who became governor after the crash, said he would appoint Jean Carnahan if Mel Carnahan outpolled Ashcroft. The late Mr. Carnahan outpolled him.

• Speaking at a Justice Department prayer meeting, Ashcroft said: "The law is not about forgiveness. It is oftentimes about vengeance, oftentimes about revenge."
• News that the ambassador to the Netherlands had calico cats upset Ashcroft's advance team, who knew their boss considered the animals 'instruments of the Devil'
• Introducing his wife to women lawyers at Justice during Women's History Month, Ashcroft, according to one attendee, he describes her as 'the woman who taught him how to put dishes away. . . He said you should rotate your china, put your new plates on the bottom of the stack, so you don't wear them out."
• Ashcroft likes to have reading matter reduced, in the words of one former staffer, to a "paragraph of background and a paragraph of talking points." Receiving a 12-page report, Ashcroft said, "Do I get extra credit for reading all this?"
• Ashcroft used black prisoners at servants at the Missouri governor's mansion.
• During one dinner there, Ashcroft said, 'Women in the workforce have become so prevalent that a man's role has been reduced to a sperm donor.'
• From 1963 to 1969 he received seven military deferments.
• In 1998 the John Birch Society ranked him second in legislative scorecard.
• Governor Ashcroft told his lieutenant governor, Harriet Woods, "You have to promise you won't serve as governor in my absence." In return he might give her something more substantial to do in her job. She explained that such a deal would violate the law. "He blinked. On the other hand, he wasn't telling me or anybody when he left the state."
• Interviewing a candidate for head of Missouri's social services, Governor Ashcroft asked, "Mr. Offer, let me start by asking you if have the same sexual preference as most men?"
• He has supported ten additional amendments to the Constitution including one to make it easier to amend.
• He received the most negative votes ever cast by the Senate in opposition to his nomination as attorney general.
• In his memoirs, Ashcroft regularly compares himself to Christ, describing his campaign victories as 'resurrections' and his defeats as 'crucifixions.'
(credit: Judy Bachrach, Vanity Fair)

Ashcroft is a lifelong member of the Assembly of God church. His father was an AofG minister. That's also called the Pentecostal church. Pentecostals, also know as "holy rollers," celebrate their faith by speaking in tongues, healing, prophesy, knowledge unobtainable by natural means and discernment of spirits such as angels and demons. Some Pentecostal churches include snake handling in their religious ceremonies.
Ashcroft and the president are said to be especially close because of their mutual devotion to Christianity, and their shared belief that God speaks special messages to them.

Tuesday, June 08, 2004

C-Span Hints at More Wheels Coming off Bush Wagon

The memo discussed in this article was among the hot topics when the Senate Judiciary Committee grilled John Ashcroft on Anti Terrorist Efforts.
Watching senators from both sides of the aisle grill Ashcroft on C-Span last night was very encouraging for those of us who believe the Bush administration are denying culpability for the torture of prisoners in Iraq's Abu Ghraib prison and elsewhere.
Though the memo has already been leaked to the press, Ashcroft steadfastly refused to turn the original over to the Senate investigative committee.
He wouldn't even say if the memo(s) were classified or not.
Though the president can theoretically claim executive privilege in releasing the memo to the Senate, he has not done so.
Ashcroft tried to cite that privilege, but he's not the president and hasn't got the power to claim executive privilege.
When pushed by Senator Dick Durbin (D Illinois) to state which law allowed Ashcroft to refuse to turn over the memo, Ashcroft squirmed and stuttered and sidestepped at such an alarming rate, I was almost uncomfortable for him.
But he was unable to answer the question, even when Sen. Durbin suggested his refusal to turn over the memo or cite applicable law that protected him from turning it over was in contempt of Congress.
Later in the hearing, when bluntly asked whether Bush okayed the abuse and torture that would lead to Iraqi prisoners and detainees divulging useful information, Ashcroft said Bush had issued an order not to defy the war and civilian prisoner treatment provisions of the Geneva Conventions that prohibit torture.
But when Ashcroft was asked if Bush had said or issued any further orders that might allow the use of torture or abuse, Ashcroft simply refused to answer yes or no.
Apparently, Ashcroft did not want to perjure himself, but it was pretty damned clear he had an answer he didn't want to give.
It seems Ashcroft was saving his own ass, and in the process making Bush look guilty as hell.
What was remarkable was the intensity of the questioning by Republican Senators, who often seemed impatient and exasperated with the Attorney General's sidestepping and equivocation.
As I said months ago, eventually even some GOP legislators would grow disgusted with the Bush administration's stubborn secrecy and their refusal to abide by the laws as set forth in the Constitution.
Stories like these start with obscure Senate hearings on C-Span.
From hearings like this, small kernels of lies and scandal start to emerge. Dots start to connect.
Covering up the truth in cases like this is called obstruction of justice.
Crimes are bad, but covering them by lying to the Senate or Congress is what brings down politicians, crooks, liars, traitors and thieves.
Another wheel is coming loose.

...And we still have to get to the outing of CIA agent Valerie Plame case, where Bush has already retained Jim Sharp, a high power criminal defense attorney based in Washington, DC.
Outing a CIA agent is a serious felony, made doubly serious with the advent of the Patriot Act.
When George Herbert Walker Bush led the CIA, he rightly called outing an agent, "an act of high treason."

That case will be the final wheel flying off, mark my words.
Sic semper tyrannis, baby.

Sneak Preview, Leaked to me by a Secret White House Snitch

George W. Bush Eulogizes Ronald Reagan

My fellow sad Americans:
Good morners mourning, uhh, good morning mourners:
I, uhh, remember the first time when I saw Roland Reagan. It was on the television and I saw the late president when he wasn't yet a president but instead a great actor. Uhh he was quite a great, great actor.
And in this movie, uhh, the president was cohosted with his not-then wife Nancy, in which she played a chimp called Bonzo, very convincingly in her fur costume. Heh heh, she still likes her furs too, only not around her face, heh, heh.
And it was a funny movie but it had a message which is stay the course.
And the late president stayed the course a lot. He stayed it a real lot.
Even when the doctors told him he was stucken with a disease called Old Timer's disease, he uhh, stayed the course even when he, uhh, he didn't know the course, of course with his wife Nancy to help him stay the course he did not know he was on. And that is how the late president was in life as well, always on course even when the course was not, uhh, coursely.
As president he was a popular person with his hard line on communism and his budget brainliness and in fact he inspired me to be a, uhh, a president too with his movie Meet the Gipper, where he asked all Americans to get one for him, or uhh the Gipper, which is who he was. And I did. Uhh, get one for him.
Today we mourn the loss of President Gipper, uh, Raggae and it reminds me of my younger days.
Back then, my dad and Mr. Raggae were running for an office and I remember telling my old fraternity brothers how, uhh, Raggae and Bush sounded like a Bob Marley album.
Marley was a distinguished African American from Jamaica who was famed for his special music that, uhh, brought all the peoples together. All of them together in peace which was also a big thing with President Raggae.
President Raggae was famous for his words, "Mr. Gorbachow, make this wall come down," which as history tells us caused the great wall of China to collapse and ended communism, which was a bad, bad idea. It was a very bad idea.
And now that communism has been replaced by talibanism, it is within the shadow of my predecessor Mr. Raggae that I too intend to ask Mr. Gorbachow to, uhh, to tear that wall down, too. And like President Raggae, I will prevail and that taliban wall will come down on all of us.
Let me close with the 23rd salmon, which is a famous Bible verse known for funerals.
The Lord is my Sheepherder whom from I shall not want to roam.
He maketh me to lie down in green pastures and nap when I feel weariness
He leadeth me beside the still waters and I drink from it deeply
He restoreth my soul and maketh me feel better
He leadeth me in the paths of righteousness for His name' sake
and He talketh to me personally and telleth me the Right thing to do

Yea, though I send troops through the valley of the shadow of death,
I will fear no evil terrorists: For thou art with me and on my side;
Thy rod and thy staff, they comfort me. Thy bombs and missiles, they cover me. Thy six feet of rebarred concrete, they insulate me
Thou preparest a table before me in the presence of mine enemies; they eat sand and kibble as I eat brisket and pecan pie
Thou annointest my head with Saudi oil; My personal cup runneth over, as doth my vice president's, my cabinet's and most of my largest campaign contributors.

Surely goodness and mercy shall follow me all the days of my life,
and I will dwell in the White House of the Lord forever. Amen.

The Deck is Stacked

Remember those playing cards that featured mugshots of all the Iraqi and terrorist criminals wanted by the FBI?
Now there's Bush playing cards that feature Bush and all his criminal cronies like Ashcroft, Cheney, Rice and the rest of those liars.
I just ordered two packs, one for myself and one to use either as a gift or a prize I'll offer from Pulp Friction for some contest I've yet to invent.
If you can't wait, you can order them at this site.
Blog Salad

--I read that Eminem mooned the audience at the MTV Movie Awards. Is this newsworthy? Does anyone expect anything different from this kid?
--Jennifer Lopez married Marc Anthony last weekend. Someone should tell JLo it's okay to sleep with guys without having to become engaged or marry them.
JLo reminds us all that marriage is a sacred institution between a man and a woman, and should only be entered into after some seriously whimsical deliberation.
--British actress Alex Kingston was booted from ER in her role as Dr. Elizabeth Corday. She at first said it was because she was too old (41). Perhaps it was her $150,000 per episode paycheck that did it. I don't think it was her age, I mean, ER is not exactly a teen favorite.
--Ex Baywatch Mimbo David Hasselhoff was arrested last Saturday in SoCal for DUI. In 2002 he had announced a check-in to the Betty Ford Center after a stumbling drunk incident outside a NYC bar. Apparently, he needs to get back that car he used to have that drives itself.
--"Singer" Eric Benet is pestering Halle Berry to throw out their prenup and support him in the manner to which he became accustomed once they are divorced. How embarrassing. I am not buying another single Eric Benet CD in protest. What? There are no CD's? Oh, well.
--This year marks the 10th anniversary of the murder of Nicole Brown Simpson and Ron Goldman.
O.J. Simpson said the media has convinced people he's guilty and said "he looks forward to finding the real killer so he can have the pleasure of proving people wrong."
Saying he no longer has the money to hire investigators to track down "the real killer," O.J. should seek employment with the Bush administration. They need liars who are able to convince juries they are not guilty, what with the Valerie Plame/CIA scandal they'll have to soon deal with.
--Women in a study who drank at least one sugar-sweetened soda a day were 85 percent more likely to develop type 2 diabetes than those who drank less, said Matthias B. Schulze, who presented the Harvard School of Public Health research at the American Diabetes Association's 64th scientific sessions.
Swell. I used to drink a couple of red label Cokes a day before I developed Type 2 diabetes. Maybe I should sue those bastards?

Monday, June 07, 2004

Ronald Reagan: Dead at 93

I won't pretend to forget how much I objected to Ronald Reagan's presidency.
It's sad an old man died of a terrible disease, but to all those who have sanctified him in death, get real.
Reagan was an actor of moderate abilities who managed to capture the votes of the Screen Actors Guild and lead that union as a liberal democrat.
Then he snuck behind many of their backs and ratted them out as communists to the FBI.
This paragon of family values dumped his first wife Jane Wyman after he knocked up a starlet named Nancy Davis.
At some point he became a republican.
His first act as California's GOP governor was to stick them with a state income tax.
As our nation's president, he mastered the glib line, the sound byte, and the art of talking the talk without walking the walk. He racked up a $325 trillion deficit and ransacked far too many social programs. He was notoriously racist and sexist. He never even uttered the word AIDS during either term in office.
He was a role model for George W. Bush, who still manages to use patriotic platitudes and glib soundbytes to mollify the brain dead of the electorate. His economic policies are even worse than Ronnie's, but Reagan showed him it could be gotten away with.
Reagan started all this conservative bullshit in America, and look where it's dragged us now.

I'm sorry for Nancy Reagan, who seemed to adore the guy.
I'm sorry for the Reagan kids, whose daddy seemed to have little time for them.
Mostly, I'm sorry that millions will die from the same disease he did, when stem cell research could find a cure for Alzheimer's Disease.
The Bush Christian Fundamentalists think any form of stem cell research is baby killing.
Even Nancy Reagan thinks he's wrong. That's one of two places we agree.
Dubya will be trying to milk Reagan's death for votes. He'll try to liken his presidency to Reagan's.
The Reagans have hated the Bush family ever since they found out Dubya's brother Neil Bush and John F. Hinckley's brother, Scott, were chummy. John Hinckley tried to kill Reagan to impress Jodie Foster. The Hinckley's have contributed a wad to various Bush campaigns.
So, when you head Dubya liken himself to Reagan, call Nancy and ask her what she thinks.
She'll say Dubya is an asshole.
That's the other place we agree.

Sunday, June 06, 2004

Harry Potter III

Saw it today and loved it.
It was the best of the three HP movies.
It wasn't suitable for children under 10, I don't think, but it was plenty entertaining enough for adults.
The cast was amazing. Cameos by Emma Thompson and Julie Christie!
Gary Oldham played a great Serius Black.
Did you see it? What did you think?

Saturday, June 05, 2004

The Bet is On

My political nemesis and pal Barcodie and I have been exchanging our traditional political e-mail today, where we swap barbs about his boy Bush the imbecile and my candidate, the distinguished Senator from Massachusetts, John Kerry.
Finally fed up with his silly blathering, I bet him $50 Kerry would win and Bush would lose.
He not only took the bait, he upped the bet to $100, which I gleefully accepted.

Can I get a witness?
Is He Kidding?

"I met with George (Tenant) last night in the White House," Mr. Bush said. "I had a good visit with him. He told me he was resigning for personal reasons. I told him I'm sorry he's leaving. He's done a superb job on behalf of the American people."

Bush must be using the word "superb" as a substitute for "horrible."
He said Rumsfeld also was doing "a superb job," remember?

Are we expected to keep believing all this horseshit?

Wednesday, June 02, 2004

Instant Karma

I found this retooling of the classic John Lennon song in an article by Gary Leupp in the online newsletter, "Counterpunch."
I think it's pretty catchy.

Instant karma gonna get you
Gonna knock you right on the head
Betta get your act together Dubya
Soon you'll be politically dead
What in the world you thinking of
Smirking like a fratboy, former gov
What on Earth you trying to do?
Grab Iraq, or Iran and Syria too?
Instant karma's gonna get you
Gonna smack you right on the face
Better get yourself together Dubya
And join the human race
How in the world you gonna see
Smirking like a chimpanzee
Who in the world you think you are?
A superstar? On the stage of war?
Why in the world are we here?
Surely not to live in pain and fear.
Why on earth are you there
Enraging and scaring---
You're gonna get your share.

Well we'll all shine on
In the nuclear war that's to come
Yes we'll all shine on
If Dubya continues to bomb
But it won't be long
Before he and his gang are gone
No it won't be long
Their karma is just too wrong

Gary Leupp is Professor of History at Tufts University, and Adjunct Professor of Comparative Religion.