Tuesday, April 26, 2011

Stick With Reality TV, Ya Putz

If Donald Trump was serious about a presidential run instead of just trying to drum up publicity for himself and his Apprentice shows, the birther card wouldn't have even been in his deck.
One would think that this self-proclaimed business expert/quasi-billionaire would attack Obama's economic policies, but no, he started his so-called campaign with this hackneyed, teabagger birther issue that's been debunked at least a thousand times.
Hell, even a monkey with a keyboard could find a copy of Obama's Hawaiian birth certificate online in about three minutes.
Besides, Donald Trump has more dirty laundry than Amy Winehouse's steamer trunk after a month's vacation.
Like what?
Oh, I'm glad you asked.
Trump has continually violated anti-trust laws and settled for millions and millions of dollars.
Trump screwed the state of New Jersey out of sales tax for his yacht purchase.
On that yacht, Trump exploited women whom he hired to parade around in bikinis while he was making business deals with other dirty old men.
Back when Trump was married to his first victim, Ivana, he had the colossal balls to move Marla Maples, his then-mistress, to the apartment right next door to the Trump's apartment in Trump Tower.
Ivana Trump was employed as CEO of his Atlantic City hotel and casino, but in the divorce he tried to say she was neither associated with nor entitled to any of the value of those community properties.
As part of their prenuptual agreement, Trump insisted that Ivana signed the document which excluded "dating other people" as grounds for divorce.
After their divorce, Ivana Trump had a free ride discussing her failed marriage in the media, but Trump used his good-old-boy buddies in the New York Supreme Court's Appelate Division to gag her, in a 5-0 vote.
After he broke it off with his second victim Marla Maples and hit the dating scene, Trump was screwing so many women he insisted they all get AIDS tests before screwing them. He said of his testing rule, "It's scary out there."
So, we know he's a devout cheater and avid pussy hound.
We also know he's had more shady business deals than Bernie Madoff.
We know he's a bloated egotist who craves media attention like a junkie craves heroin.
And we know if he started putting his toes into the shallow end of the GOP presidential hopeful pool by splashing up the birther issue, he's got nuthin.'
I'd like to buy that douche bag for what he's worth and sell him for what he thinks he's worth. I'd be a zillionaire.

Monday, April 11, 2011

I Told Ya So, I Told Ya So, I Told Ya, Told Ya, Told Ya So...

You gotta hand it to the dastardly Republicans and teabaggers.
They actually pulled it off--putting a covert GOP agent disguised as a progressive liberal Democrat in the White House.
This Obama character has turned out to be John Boner's Lhasa Apso.
Obama will go down in history as the weakest, most duplicitous president in American history.
Back in 2008, I told you people to go for Hillary Clinton.
Oh sure, she's a warmonger and a bitch, but she would have NEVER allowed the Republicans to shit all over her like they have Obama. And she would have out-Nixoned foreign policy.
The GOP has the ignoramus electorate all worried about Islamic terrorists and the second amendment while they ransack the treasury, pork barrel the wealthiest corporations (and individuals) in the nation, and run us into bankruptcy.
Meanwhile, Obama claps his hands in victory each time the GOP rams another horrible plan down his throat.
Who knew this once-brilliant orator would turn into a quivering Don Knotts once he was elected?
What exactly does he stand for?
What election promises has he kept?
I don't think he's evil per se, I just think he's a lily livered coward and a full blown masochist. He's meeker than any Democratic president in history.
I have lost all respect for him because he's a sniveling coward.
He's a turncoat.
He's a right-wing conservative in black face make-up.
What a fucking dud.
I simply don't care about politics anymore.
I think America is going down the drain, and it's too late to stop the downward trajectory.
I'd rather keep up with the Kardashians and watch Netflix movies than pay any more attention to radical right politicians who've ruined a once-great nation.

Tuesday, April 05, 2011

A Sad Story

The year was 1979.
I had just moved back to Texas from Venice Beach in California.
I rented an apartment in a beat up 4-plex near the college I was attending. My neighbor across the hall was named Wanda, a hairdresser with a ravenous taste for pretty young women.
After several months of non-stop dating (for both of us), Wanda met Mary Jane and fell in love. Wanda was 27 and Mary Jane was just finishing high school, but neither cared.
Mary Jane was really cute. She wore dark, spiky hair and she was model thin. She has a sweet disposition and the charm of the country girl she was.
They broke up not too long after they got together, probably because of the age difference, but also because Wanda was a fickle dog who ran through women like a crackhead runs through rock.
Within a year, we all moved from the 4-plex because it had been sold and was being torn down.
Time has worn on and I've stopped going to bars and most huge lesbian parties.
I lost touch with both of them, but I still remembered Mary Jane fondly, and was thrilled to hear 15 years ago that she was living with my good friend Melissa, someone whose character was sterling and heart was big.
They are still together.
Last week, I got a very cryptic birthday party invitation in the mail from Mary Jane.
In it was a long note explaining that she was celebrating her 50th birthday as a memorial, since her health had gotten bad and she wasn't sure there'd be a 51st birthday. Of course I went to the gathering last Sunday, and I was shocked to see Mary Jane.
She was in a wheelchair, hooked up to an oxygen tank, and three times the size she was when I last saw her. Though she could barely speak between oxygen gasps, she held out her arms to me and said how excited she was to see me.
After the event, I drove home feeling sad and shocked.
She's got emphysema, congestive heart failure and diabetes caused by too many steroids used to treat the other complications.
If she lasts another month, it'll be a miracle.
I've seen so much death in my lifetime. One year I attended 16 funerals caused by AIDS.
My parents are dead. My husband is dead. My last boyfriend is dead. A lot of my old friends have died.
And now it looks like another old friend, only 50-years-old, will be dead soon.
It's sad, but it's really not.
Death is just part of the circle of life, and I have learned through reading dozens of books on the subject that it's good on the other side. It's really good.
And our souls do live on.
Lately, I've been fighting situational depression.
My expectations are inversely proportional to my serenity, and I let myself forget that for too many weeks.
Mary Jane's situation reminded me that health, freedom to move about, and love are the things that bring true joy.
I've got all three, so I have nothing to bitch about.
If you pray, please pray for the soaring of Mary Jane's soul...whenever her time comes. Thanks.

Friday, April 01, 2011

Stupid Texas Politicians, Again

Every fall the state of Texas provides families with no-tax weekends on school clothes and a variety of school supplies so they can save a little money while buying their kids what they need.
Inspired by this tax-free weekend, Texas State Senator Glenn Heger, from the booming metropolis of Katy, has filed a bill for another tax-free weekend in Texas.
Heger's tax-free weekend proposal would apply to the purchase of all manner of firearms, ammo and other weapons.
See, Texas hunters and gun freaks need a break from having to pay taxes on their arsenals. Hell, I'm sure the senator would like to see weapons entirely tax exempt, year around.
This story is why I've been shying away from political posts. Politicians in Texas are 98 percent stupid fucking idiots and 2 percent halfway decent.
My fondest wish is that Sen. Heger invites Dick Cheney to go hunting with him. I'll even provide the bottle(s) of Jack Daniels for them.