My Dinner With Niblet's Mama



Last night I had the chance to meet up with my delightful fellow Blogger D-Guz from (Impeachment) and Other Dreams. See link to the right, I forgot how to hyperlink.
I picked her up at her parents house, just north of Bumfuck Texas, and got to meet her adorably sweet Mama.
Poor D-Guz had never laid eyes on me before, and there I was speaking broken Spanish to her Mom and inviting her along with us. She declined, but I think she liked that I asked.
So off we went.
I didn't want to scare her, so I drove my car Tina Turner nice and slow, sans radar detector. We got kinda lost and ended up driving an extra 20 miles trying to find civilization, and this was with navigation.
We finally got to our destination, a funky chic restaurant in the gay part of town called La Fonda on Main.
There on the patio in picture perfect weather, we quaffed margaritas and semi-decent Tex Mex, while the conversation soared. Seriously, there wasn't one awkward moment of silence.
D-Guz is smart and funny and kind, just like you'd expect from reading her Blog.
She has a perfect, bright white smile, like you see in the "after" side of those "before and after" dental ads.
She said she thought I'd be a lot different in person...she didn't elaborate, but I think she meant a lot more profane, crustier and crankier. I vowed to start Blogging a little softer after hearing that.
We share a very similar sense of humor, so it was great to comment on nearby diners, rake our fellow Bloggers over the coals (in a nice way) and of course talk politics.
Once we pushed away our half-eaten plates and drained our second margaritas, off we went to the Candlelight Coffee House and Wine Bar, where again we sat outside near the koi pond on their gorgeous, tree lined patio.
We ran into my old friend Chris, whom D-Guz charmed so much I thought he'd never leave.
Fueled by margaritas and caffeine, we swapped hilarious ex girlfriend/lover/partner stories and forged a wonderful kinship in the process. I felt like I'd known her for 20 years--that's how easy to know she turned out to be.
We thought about telling FranIAm and Lisa that we'd really connected and spent a torrid night together, but I think we're both too lazy to make up details like that.
Toward the end of the evening, D-Guz produced her cell phone camera and suggested a picture, but I nixed it. I prefer being a woman of mystery online. :)
Anyway, I feel so fortunate we hooked up. She's a truly amazing woman with a keen sense of humor packaged in a soft little bundle.
But most of all, the chick is smart. Her intellect crackles with electricity and her vocabulary is sensational. And she has the voice of the softest little femme kitten, which belies her physical sturdiness.
I wish she lived in San Antonio.
The chick is totally cool. When she moves to Sonoma, I am totally there.

Y'all Go Ahead and Wade Through the NBC Promo,
It's Worth It

I'll Tell You What



Obama's Stimulus Plan calls for tax hikes for anyone making more than $250,000 per year.
I'll tell you what.
Play me $250,000 a year and you can tax me at 50 percent.
I think I could survive on $125,000 a year just fine.
:)

HAHAHAHAHA! Are They Kiddin'?



Oh man, my abs are still sore from laughing at the pencil neck geek the Republicans pushed out in front to give the Republican response to President Obama's amazing speech.
Bobby Jindal is the future of the Republican party? WHAAAT?
That's fantastic!
From his goofy accent to his Opie-esque earnestness to his ridiculously canned response that made absolutely no sense, this guy was to Obama as Larry the Cable Guy is to Brad Pitt.
Oh my God, I'm thrilled that the GOP is grooming Jindal and Sarah Palin as their early frontrunners for the 2012 presidential race.
Bobby Jindal?
HAHAHAHAHA!

Tim Geithner
Get On the Stick, Boy!



Treasury Secretary Tim Geithner needs to quit organizing his office supplies and hire some senior staff and start behaving as if the economic crisis we are in is real.
This is no time to fake it until you make it, Geithner either has the skills to handle this Herculean task or he doesn't.
If he doesn't, President Obama needs to quickly clear him out and bring in someone who has the chops for the job.
America's economic crisis is THE biggest problem our nation is facing right now. Geithner's face and voice should be on every newscast, every day, until economic conditions become more stable.
Until the economy is stabilized, the President is having to put other issues into holding patterns, like what to do about detainees and prisoners from the wars in Iraq and Afghanistan.
Keith Olbermann and Arianna Huffington discuss those holding patterns in this video.

Visit msnbc.com for Breaking News, World News, and News about the Economy

Geithner is slowing down Obama's administration, causing it to have to focus on issues he should be handling. Is anyone here impressed with what they've seen so far from the Treasury secretary? Count me out.

Hip-Hop Republicans, Riiiight?



Newly elected Republican National Committee Chairman Michael Steele plans an "off the hook" public relations offensive to attract younger voters, especially blacks and Hispanics, by applying the party’s principles to "urban-suburban hip-hop settings."

The RNC’s first black chairman said he will surprise everyone when updating the party’s image using the Internet and advertisements on radio, television and in print, he told The Washington Times.

I love it.
When I think Republicans, the words "off the hook" and "hip-hop" do not come to mind.
In fact, the words "modern" or "innovative" don't come to mind, either.

I realize the GOP thought electing a Black committee chairman was a great way to keep up with the Obamas, but they must be spitting up their single malts hearing this idiot announce his plans to hip-hopitize the honkies.

Between Steele and known lunatic Alan Keyes, the GOP's version of Black Americans is downright hilarious.
I hope they do manage to attract more Black Republicans to their crew...like these guys:

Rick Perry: What a Dick



Oh, brother.
First, Texas Governor Rick Perry stood up and bloviated about how much he hated the stimulus bill and how he might refuse to accept the money on behalf of millions of Texans.
Then of course he accepted it. Turd.
These damned Texas Republicans are so far behind the times, they actually think Bush is still in office and they still have power and credibility.
GOP's Rick Perry and Senators John Cornyn and Kay Bailey Hutchison can be counted on to do the opposite of what's good for Texans.
But Perry is most dangerous of the three because he's one of those Republicans, you know, the ones who are secretly gay and angry about it.
These closeted Republicans must think they have to be ultra mean, openly pessimistic and tough on social programs to seem more macho.
I don't think it's by coincidence that an arsonist torched the Texas Governor's mansion on Perry's watch. Hateful people like Perry draw negative energy toward themselves.
I know Texans tends to delay new trends, but I hope within the next four years, when Texans see President Obama making positive changes in the nation, they'll dump these Republican creeps and elect some people who care more about people than money and corporate greed.

Haven't we had enough shit like this?



Rupert Murdoch's New York Post cartoonist likening President Obama's reputation after getting his the bailout plan passed to the necessity of shooting that errant chimpanzee is just too much.
Murdoch needs to fire that idiot cartoonist, then fire the editor who okayed running the cartoon.
Then he needs to take both of those idiots, dip them in mashed bananas and chimpanzee estrus juice and throw them into the nearest all-male chimpanzee mosh pit.

Self-Muzzling



I have a million hilarious, sad, rage-inducing stories to tell about my former career, but if ever there was a time to keep my powder dry, this is it.
So here I am, a veteran Blogger with a head full of topics and the sense not to write about them just yet.
I'll have to keep things generic for now, m'kay?

As it turns out, I am not the corporate type.
Suiting up every morning at 7 a.m. and having to arrange my hair and make-up was bad enough, but folding my car into rush hour traffic and carrying around a briefcase in a 16-story office tower made me feel like I was miscast in a bad movie.
I was Vice President of Public Affairs.
That means I was supposed to do a lot of writing and schmoozing with outsiders, which suited me well.
What did not suit me were the constant staff meetings that seemed to be called for the sole purpose of letting the tiny little egotistical prick of a CEO sit at the head of the conference table and pretend to be running a business.
That, and a zillion redundant reports, reports about the reports, and reading others' reports consumed way too many hours per day.
At one point, weekly staff meetings on Mondays spun off into department meetings they spaced throughout the rest of the day.
So, we'd waste an hour or two in the morning meeting bragging to each other about what we were allegedly accomplishing, then we'd meet with the tiny CEO and his cronies later that day and rehash everything for another hour.
Sometimes he'd want a written report summarizing the meeting, then once that was handed to him, he'd ask what it was for.
Toward the end, we had an emergency, mandatory meeting where the COO laid out the new rules: No talking to each other about the business, no threatening each other and no sex talk.
Seriously, wouldn't those three forbidden topics make you want to ask everyone in sight exactly why those rules had to be made?

Ooops, I am getting a little beyond generic.
Never mind.

"Pick Me, Pick Me!"
"Never mind, I don't wanna do it."



In a classic, chickenshit Republican move, GOP patsy Sen. Judd Gregg campaigned for the job as Obama's Commerce Secretary, got the job, then promptly gave it back.
I think it's been really fascinating to watch how Obama has reached out to the GOP only to have them publicly shit all over his kindly overtures.

There's brilliance in Obama extending the olive branch to the GOP so early in his campaign.
After widely publicized, repeated attempts to reach across the partisan divide, can anyone cite even one example where Republicans have returned gestures of civility or cooperation?

Nope.

Good thing.
It's wise to get them out of the way early in the President's first term. He tried. They refused to try.
We all saw what happened.

Unilateral relationships don't work. Trust me on that, Mr. President. You did your best, but--dare I use the cliche?
They just weren't that into you.