Thursday, February 21, 2008

Zipdrive's Political Rundown





It's high time I stop publishing adorable kitten pictures and get back to what I used to do: political snark.
So here is my rundown on the candidates we have remaining.

John McCain
It's really too bad America's sub-par educational system has produced so many IQs swimming in the shallow end of the pool. The NASCAR watching, gun owning, Jesus- loving set fell for the central casting-inspired Bush 43, and they are poised to vote for McCain and continue the madness.
Recently, some charges have been leveled at McCain, claiming he was sexually involved with a female lobbyist. While I thought it was refreshing that GOP McCain was not caught diddling an under-age boy, I was not surprised when I read about the lobbyist. McCain in his early adulthood was a handsome Navy pilot. At only 5'7", the little man was probably an avid cocksmith. With Viagra so plentiful and his trophy wife high on Percoset, is it any wonder he might screw around?
All that aside, his 100-year war statement and his new endorsement of waterboarding makes him Bush with a brain. No, thanks.
Barack Obama
He's a little like Jesus, in that I like him, but his followers get too carried away in their youthful exhuberance for my taste.
I think TX State Rep. Kirk Watson summed it up the other night when he was on a talk show speaking about his support for Obama.
When Tim Russert asked him what he considered Obama's major accomplishments in the Senate, Watson went silent and the sound of chirping crickets filled the air.
I'll vote for Obama if he wins, but I'd vote for any Democrat over any Republican.
I still don't think Obama represents me as a middle-aged, white lesbian, but at least he won't come after me like the Bush crowd did.
I think he'd be a great new face for America, but I worry about him being assassinated. With all the guns and all the nuts on the right, he's a sitting duck.
And all his Kumbaya- Blowin' in the Wind-style speeches may have caught my fancy back in the 70's, but I'm a little too mature to be taken in by flowery words-especially borrowed ones.
To think he's above lobbyist influence and huge corporate donations is naive at best and gullible at worst. Give it a rest, Gen X'ers. Vote for him if you want, but don't fool yourself that he's somehow above it all. He's not.
Hillary Clinton
When I attended the public memorial for the late Ann Richards, I was pleased to see Hillary sitting in the semi-circle on stage as a guest eulogist.
I was glad she was there to show her respects, but her habit of dropping the "g's" on words ending in "ing" was disconcerting. Clearly, she was pandering to a Texas audience and her attempt to sound Texassy was way off the fuckin' mark.
I wish I could say I'd love to have a beer with her, but I have a feeling we wouldn't mesh well as pals.
But as a candidate, I adore her.
She entered the Senate with obviously higher aspirations, yet she was said to be humble and hardworking as a newbie. She sought out the counsel of senior ranking Senators on both sides of the aisle, and even Sen. John McCain has said he likes her very much.
As a woman, she's had to hawk it up to appeal to misogynists who think a woman over 60 might one day start her period and push the red button.
It's unfortunate that she's had to pretend she was for Bush's invasion of Iraq, and even worse that she's refused to admit she made a huge mistake in believing the bogus reports BushCo provided the Senate to justify the invasion.
But she doesn't have that luxury, because she's a woman who has to seem tough on terror to appease the flag wavers among us.
With a Black man and a white woman in the race, I've been astounded to learn that America is far less racist and far more misogynistic than I thought it was.
These GenX Obama fans, especially the women, were born post Roe-v-Wade, post-Stonewall, post-Selma and post-everything women like Hillary, my sisters and me fought like hell in the streets for back in the 60's and 70's.
They don't see the wonder of electing a feminist president because they don't even remember that America failed to ratify the ERA. They don't even know what ERA stands for.
And yes, Hillary's probably a bitch. So? So am I.
Like that bastard Nixon, Hillary's inherent bitch persona would serve us well in global politics. Nobody should doubt that she would protect us with the ferocity of a Mama Lion.
America was far more prosperous and peaceful during the Bill Clinton era. By association, I believe Hillary stands for the same economic and diplomatic principles Bill had as president.
Obama is an unproven commodity. He gives thrilling speeches, but what else has he got? Inspiration is great, but is it enough?

12 comments:

Lulu Maude said...

Obama is the proverbial man on a horse. He's ridden in to restore order to our dusty little American town.

I worry about his being assassinated, too.

Any sense of how Texas is going to vote? Seems to be Hillary's last chance.

p.s. You can always alternate between Baby Jake and the affairs of state...

Anonymous said...

Texas is said to be split 50-50.
I saw a lot of the debate last night and I thought HRC did pretty well.

Unknown said...

The return of the snark!!!!!!!!! YAY!

You have made me think about Hillary more than anyone KZ..thanks woman, I appreciate your pov on all the candidates.

Neither of the two Dem's are above reproach. And as for WeatherVane McCain..the word Alzheimer's comes to mind. We do not need a man that survived years of torture and yet votes to allow it as our President. And anyone that doesn't mind sending American's into Iraq for a hundred years is fucking delusional.

He is part of the worst the Republican's have to offer.

nobody's fool said...

I just finished a post yesterday on how Obama's followers think he walks on water, when in fact he does the same things everyone else in the race is doing; he just gets a free pass.

Hillary was great in the debate last night; specifically near the end. Very gracious. I wish she do that more often -- speak her mind instead of her handlers' -- it works much better for her.

When you point out to the younger generation's women all the shit we went through to get them where they are; they get very defensive and snippy. No one likes having a mirror held up to their faces and having to look the misogyny dead-on.

Anonymous said...

Regarding the younger generation:
Just before the 2004 election, I had the opportunity to have a group e-mail discussion with my siblings and my oldest nephew, who stated his intention to vote AGAIN for Bush43.
I carefully researched my main points of contention, and when the nephew read my e-mail, he replied, "Oh, blah, blah, blah."
I was pretty livid and so was my sister. My brother (his daddy) said he felt humiliated by his son's arrogance and rude reply.
This nephew is not only a Republican, he also makes his living buying diamonds from God knows where. If he were to discover they were blood diamonds, I am dead certain he wouldn't give a damn.
Recently I learned his company is going bankrupt, apparently because the diamond buying public is starting to feel Bush's recession pains. Ouch!
My nephew is part of this arrogant GenX generation who dismiss anyone over 40 (much less 50) as being meaningless old fogies.
I happen to know a Big Wig in Dallas (where he lives) who is in a definite position to hire and fire employees. I thought for a moment about recommending she get my nephew an interview--but then I thought, I cannot really recommend him because I think his arrogance and ignorance are definite character flaws he needs to look at.
In fact, I think he should show his support for Bush and the neocons by enlisting in the military. Ha. Fat chance.
Ask the average under-30 voter why they are for Obama or McCain and I can guarantee they have no sense of history from which to draw upon, and no understanding of what the issues of today are.
Whoever said youth was wasted on the young was right.
Fuckin' whippersnappers.

Mike Thomas said...

That was actually Chris Matthews and not Tim Russert who humiliated Sen. Kirk Watson the other night. But just because Watson wasn't adequately prepped, doesn't mean that Obama has no legislative accomplishments.

I tried to stay neutral in this race as long as I could, and I would have gladly gotten behind Hillary if she had been able to knock off Obama at any point. But I finally had to come out in support of Obama just as a practical matter once it was clear that Hillary wasn't going to pull it off. At this point, there is no way Hillary can win by large enough margins in the remaining contests to catch up to Obama in the pledged delegate count.
The best thing now is for Hillary to lose Texas and then graciously bow out so that Democrats can start regrouping behind Obama. Otherwise, this thing could go to a brokered convention with big fights over superdelegates while the Republicans sit back, sharpen their knives and enjoy the fratricide.

Anonymous said...

Hi Mike, thank you for stopping by.
I think while Obama has co- sponsored some fairly important legislation, he's not on a par with Hillary in terms of committee membership and purse-string controls. Please don't make me have to prove that, it's all there for anyone who wants to check.
If Hillary loses Texas, she may well be right to bow out gracefully.
However, if Obama makes it and loses to McCain, I hope Obama and his supporters are ready for four years of finger wagging and bitching. ;)

dguzman said...

Karen, I wasn't surprised that America is more misogynist than racist; sexism is promoted in our culture, racism isn't anymore.

God, I hope Hillary wins Texas. I wish I were there to vote for her! And I wish Molly Ivins and Ann Richards were there to vote for her too. Dammit.

Anonymous said...

Molly Ivins didn't like Hillary as a candidate, but I'm sure Ann Richards would have endorsed her- they were good friends.
I just ran into two fancy-schmantzy lesbian friends at the grocery store today...they both early-voted for Hillary.
My family of siblings and their mates all are voting for Hillary, that makes seven of us.

Mike Thomas said...

I agree that Hillary has more legislative experience than Obama. But if the voters were really concerned about that, they could have gone with Chris Dodd or Joe Biden or even Bill Richardson, all of whom have lengthy and distinguished legislative resumes. But that isn't enough to impress most voters today. They want "change."
Also, I think whoever wins the Democratic nomination will win the general election in a blowout. Just look at the turnout in all of the primary states. Three times as many Democrats are turning out to vote as Republicans are. And the fundraising race is another key. It used to be a given that Democrats would have a nearly 2-1 disadvantage in fundraising compared to Republicans and would have to rely on grassroots efforts to keep pace. Now the advantage has flipped. Democrats are swimming in campaign cash and Republicans are staying home in droves. The Iraq war is the reason and that dynamic is not going to change before November. Republicans are heading for a buttwhooping of Reaganesque proportions.

Karen Zipdrive said...

If voters want change *that much* they should elect a woman.
Seems to me the men have had enough chances to fuck things up.
And don't get me started that Obama's different because he's a Black man. He's still a man.

Anonymous said...

I'm going with Mike on this one. No doubt Hillary is the best candidate. But Bush 43 made that reasoning irrelevant when he was elected. Hate is the driving force behind the R's. If Hillary gets the nod, I think all the R's that currently hate McCain would come out of the woodwork to vote against her because they hate her even more.

For me its about which D can beat the R, period. Obama will take Texas and he can beat McCain.