Tuesday, February 05, 2002

Suzy has the horror of VD.

My poor, well meaning pal Suze over at QueerPoetsSociety is in a quandary over selecting the right Valentine's Day gift for each of her potential Valentines.
She's an old school Southern Belle and a Leo, so she's wanting to establish the proper etiquette for appropriate Valentine's Day comportment.
Would chocolates, flowers and a card seem too aggressive?
Would a book be too scholarly and chaste?
Would a card and a few chocolates seem paltry?
Would flowers say too much?
Would a handmade card be too smarmy?
Would just chocolates be too juvenile?
Poor baby has made this entirely too complicated.
Maybe she should write, 'I love you' on an Etch a Sketch and send one to all her potentials. That way, if it's shook up and erased when it arrives, she'll know in her own heart she spoke her mind, took a stand and even laid it on the line. Sorta.
When my nephew was a pre-teen, he solved the dilemma of Valentine's Day by breaking up with his little girlfriend a week before and reconciling with her a week after.
He sure didn't learn that Barbaric behavior from his aunt, the little pisher.
Suze is a great poet.
If I were her, I'd just write them each a nice poem on some pretty paper and leave it at that. Maybe throw in some chocolates and a few flowers. And a card.
Hmm. I am beginning to see her dilemma.


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