Friday, September 05, 2008

I Endured the Pain For You

For the first time since McGovern ran against Nixon, I actually watched most of the Republican National Convention so I could opine with some semblance of first hand knowledge.
I could not believe what I saw and heard.
The central theme seemed to be changing the status quo.
Taking back ineffectual Washington and restoring dignity.
Being mavericks and renegades who buck the broken system.
The GOP has controlled the White House for 8 years and both Houses for 6 years. Who are they reclaiming it from, themselves?
For all the dull speeches made by white men, to all the sarcastic speeches made by white men, to Sarah Palin's rousing speech that raised Obama's campaign nearly $10 million in 24 hours, to McCain's anticlimactic snoozer of an acceptance speech, I have to ask--is that all they had?
Watching McCain struggle to read the TelePrompter made it seem like he was reading his remarks for the first time. His emphasis on the wrong words, downcast eyes and the sad way he limped to the podium made me think how obvious it was that the old war horse was literally on his last lap around the track.
And for God's sake, did he actually have to tell his POW story again after we'd heard it at least eight times during the convention, in addition to seeing it in his video tribute?
There should be a word more emphatic than overkill to use at times like this.
I was momentarily engaged when that Iraqi war veteran protester flashed his sign, "How do you win an occupation?" and those Code Pink women had to be dragged out, but so bland was this convention even the protesters were a little tepid.
The only really interesting part was when Palin strutted out, eyes glistening with excitement, soaking up all the adulation like a small town birthday girl on her first trip to Disneyland.
If this ticket believes that governing is about serving the people and not about seeking individual ego gratification, you could have fooled me. Palin is definitely tripping.
She and her family energized the crowd to be sure, but it was because of sensationalism, like when poor relations come to dinner at the fancy relatives' house and drink from the finger bowls.
McCain and Palin make for an interesting combination. He's as dull as a black and white documentary about cell reproduction and she's The Jerry Springer Show.
I think the absence of Bush and the total blackout of all things Cheney made political history.
I feel embarrassed for the Republicans, and even more embarrassed for anyone gullible enough to think this ticket will be anything more than four years of Bush/Cheney.
I used to think there could be no worse team than Bush and Cheney for America.

I stand corrected.


Randal Graves said...

Sexist troop hater.

They're even worse than the last crew! Vote Change!

Vote McCain/Palin!

Dr. Monkey Von Monkerstein said...

Zing! Excellent summary.

Anonymous said...

"McCain and Palin make for an interesting combination. He's as dull as a black and white documentary about cell reproduction and she's The Jerry Springer Show."


Thanks for saying exactly what I think much funnier than I could.

You are spot on. When I compare the Obama speech to McLame's I truly feel sad for McLame.

And I have to add I think it was totally inappropriate for McLame to talk about his POW experience, especially as you say after it was already covered ad nauseum. It was rather embarassing and a really bad choice on his part.

Still and all, I loved Mittens Romney's speech best, because it was batshit insane and funny as hell. If you missed it, you should find it somewhere & watch.

Anonymous said...

Someone post a link to the Romney speech, please.

Lulu Maude said...

McCain and Lieberman are a nice pair, both having been a secondary squeeze for Dubya.


Jen-Jenny-Jennifer said...

Spot on!!!!

Anonymous said...

Ask and you shall receive!

Mittens Live 2008

Choice bits include: "You know, it's time for the party of big ideas, not the party of Big Brother."

And my personal fav: "We'll strengthen our economy and keep us from being held hostage by Putin, Chavez, and Ahmadinejad."

Now, that's neocomedy you can believe in!

Anonymous said...

She also wags her finger like bin Laden.

Independent said...

Don't know how you stomached it. All those pedophiles and boot lickers in a great big circle jerk.

Lieberman is going to pay a heavy political price for his actions should the democrats take commanding control of the Senate. He may just find himself as 3rd stringer secretary on the Senate Building Maintenance Committee.

dguzman said...

Great post, and my non-bleeding ears thank you for enduring this hell for us so we didn't have to.

Anonymous said...

It was sickening to listen to. Thank God the Daily Show had their post game coverage so I had someone to laugh with all over again.

enigma4ever said...

great post...really sums it all up..worst than bush...

Anonymous said...

Yeah I'm with KarenZipdrive. It was hell but I'll be damned if I was gonna miss any of it! There were so many good moments in the string of crap. To catch those you have to watch the rest... I'd say all in all it was worth it and yes the payoff was Daily Show at the end.

Anonymous said...

And when I say "good moments" you do all realize that I mean fuck-ups we can use against them or outright lies.

enigma4ever said...

No Helen we ALL understood...well, because when touring Hell - there are just so many photo moments...ya know?

Billie Greenwood said...

Karen, your summation of the action more than bests the lackluster b.s. the RNC produced for days hand running. This is pure gold.

(e.g. I love this phrase so much:
"...soaking up all the adulation like a small town birthday girl on her first trip to Disneyland.")

You rule.

Anonymous said...

It's funny you would picture her next to Dana Carvey's character. I actually Photoshopped her into Carvey's character yesterday. Also, have you seen the photo of her with her "barbarian" friends? It is priceless!

Katie Schwartz said...

Girl, I am proud of you for being able to stomach the convention. Love the recap. My favorite line: "McCain and Palin make for an interesting combination. He's as dull as a black and white documentary about cell reproduction and she's The Jerry Springer Show." HAHAHAHHAHA.

They can't win, they won't. No way. No how.

Distributorcap said...

karen karen karen

you forgot to mention there were probably 4 non-white people in the entire audience

and that other than cindy's day glo outfit -- there was a lot of walmart going on

this is pure gold -- it needs to be put in the National Archives