Monday, September 01, 2008

Tuna or Mackeral, Fishy is Fishy

Hmm, it seems Sarah Palin has announced that her teen daughter Bristol's belly is not postnatal bulge, it's prenatal bulge.
We knew something was amiss, and I fully believe the blogworld's curiosity about baby Trig's true parentage forced Palin into admitting her kid was knocked up BEFORE the election. Sorry we inconvenienced you, Sarah.

Here's Palin's statement:

"We have been blessed with five wonderful children who we love with all our heart and mean everything to us. Our beautiful daughter Bristol came to us with news that as parents we knew would make her grow up faster than we had ever planned. We’re proud of Bristol’s decision to have her baby and even prouder to become grandparents. As Bristol faces the responsibilities of adulthood, she knows she has our unconditional love and support.

"Bristol and the young man she will marry are going to realize very quickly the difficulties of raising a child, which is why they will have the love and support of our entire family. We ask the media to respect our daughter and Levi’s privacy as has always been the tradition of children of candidates."

Who is Levi, the baby daddy? And who the fuck names all these Alaskan kids, the ghost of Frank Zappa?

Oh right, please respect our privacy and DO NOT ask how a family values evangelical can have a knocked up 16-year-old.

Please do not ask how an inexperienced Governor of a state with fewer than a million residents will be able to juggle the office of the vice presidency of the United States while dealing with a dysfunctional family and a newborn with mental retardation.

Please do not ask how someone with such strong family values could have neglected her own daughter so much, she failed to give her even rudimentary information about birth control or safe sex practices.

Are they fucking kidding? This whole situation is a bunch of Matanuska cluster-fucked trailer trash.

Had McCain vetted this insipid clown, he would have had to nix her because of this Peyton Place in an igloo drama. But he didn't. He rushed to judgment.
And once again, he was wrong.


Karen Zipdrive said...

Note: the McCain spin machine claims he knew about the kid's baby and okayed Palin anyway.
Sure he did.
And Palin said no thanks to the bridge to nowhere funds, too.

Distributorcap said...

Palin wont make it to Friday at this rate

i left this at dusty's

this story gets uglier by the minute - and the GOP is being reduced to a wednesday episode of All My Children and i couldnt be happier

the most disgusting part is Karl Rove is in the back room figuring out how he can market the Bristol story (and to which demo) to gain the most traction in states in the tossup column

watch -- the uber-sympathy voices of the right (like that bastion of caring Ann Coulter) start milking the Bristol story to no end. They will make her a pawn -- so here is this 16 year old girl under the media microscope, her mother running for the second highest office in the land, and pregnant --

yeah this marriage has a real chance of surviving.

i feel sorry for Bristol- i actually do. she is getting used -- and most sadly used by her mother - WHO SHOULD HAVE never accepted the offer knowing her unwed teenage daughter is pregnant and, for no small thing -- she has an infant with Down's Syndrome who is gonna need more attention than any of them realize.

All My Children -- not quite -- this is more like White Trash Theatre.

i hate the GOP more and more each day

Karen Zipdrive said...

The GOP will not hestiate to slice and dice this story into some kind of happy ending bullshit without a whit of regard for Bristol, her baby daddy or the unborn baby.
The Palins need to take a long, hard look at the personal challenges they'll be facing with their retarded newborn son and their other baby having a baby.
This is not a family equipped to move to Washington DC and into the major league political arena.
Not while the wheels are coming off the family trailer.

Jess Wundrun said...

I don't think this story has been satisfactorily disproved. As I said at DCups: Irish Twins.

Almost five months along has her conceiving in April. One month less has her conceiving in May.

Let's hear from the doctors and nurses who delivered little Trig.

Anonymous said...

They're just now sending a team to vet her. What morons.

I give her until the end of the week.

Karen Zipdrive said...

Oh Jess, how I adore you. My first thought was Irish twins as well.

Morse, if the GOP jackals are just now planning to vet her, that means they are fixin' to drop the hammer on the silly twit.

Her trump card of family values has been torn to shreds with the news that she can't keep her own minor kids outta trouble.

McCain made a lousy pick. His handlers are gonna have to do some mega damage control before the waters of Gustav subside.

Anonymous said...

The R's are going up to Ak to try to shut everyone up, but its too late for that.

Maybe Sarah Palin can collaborate with Lynn Spears on the book Lynn's writing about parenting. Bristol and Jamie Lynn could talk about how cool it is to be unwed teenagers with children, and the mom's could talk about how cool it is not to give a damn about their children.

Karen Zipdrive said...

OMG Sis, I was over at Politits commenting about Bristol and Jamie Lynn doing a reality show together just as I got notice of your comment via e-mail. Great minds think alike!

As for the Reps going up to Alaska to shut people up, those Alaskans are like trying to herd cats. Good luck trying to strong-arm those tough sumbitches who can handle 50 below zero temps for weeks on end.

Anonymous said...

Well - we could all just shrug and shut up about it, but then this story wouldn't have even gotten this far, would it?

So for me, like jess, the questions remain. There may be more to this.

I'm going to keep hammering from the reproductive choice angle. And let's not forget - Palin supports policies that are anti-female and anti-family once the baby is born. She doesn't support universal health care and, based on her stated beliefs, she's prolly not a fan of federally subsidized child care, etc. to make it easier for all those women having babies to work and provide for their children.

And damn there's lots of other stuff buzzing about this candidate.

Keep at it, KZD.

Unknown said...

The whole thing had and still has legs. Her whole schtick about flying for 6-8 hours after her water started leaking is pure nonsense. Then on top of it, she drives past new hospitals to go to the one in her podunk town? Come on..

As for the preggers kid.. I too feel sorry for her. We will never know if she wanted to keep it, much less marry the father.

Karen Zipdrive said...

I intend to. And furthermore, I think Jess Wundrun might be on to something when she said "Irish Twins."

I think America needs to see some birth certificates. If there's nothing to hide, then Palin should be happy to provide them and quell the lingering rumors.

The idea of Bristol possibly getting pregnant twice in little more than a year would certainly be worth pulling out all the stops to hide.
Prove that it's not true, Governor.

Unknown said... go get her chica!!!

I heart both you and the fantastic Zippy! ;)

Randal Graves said...

Too bad the talking hairpieces won't mention the discrepancy between 'yay, abstinence!' and what a typical 17-year old does.

Enigma4ever said...


Anonymous said...

Enigma I saw that and I am confused. Who are they saying is that kid's mom, anyway?
And another thing- they say that infamous Palin family photo where Bristol was wearing the green sweater with the belly bulge was taken in '06.
She's apparently pregnant in that shot- so how long has that kid been breeding, anyway?

I'm sorry, but Palin's announcement today about her child being pregnant has not answered all the questions.

This is not a time to stop digging.

Distributorcap said...

no one could ever write this storyline


Anonymous said...

D-Cap, you are so right.
Nobody would write this story because nobody would buy it.
I've tried my best to try to sift through the various clues and bits of evidence, and I know there has to be more to this story than Bristol simply being knocked up, but it's like the Palins have intentionally added a lot of disinformation to throw everyone off.
My hunch is that Bristol and Levi are parents to back-to-back kids.
I cannot believe that Sarah Palin gave birth to Trig because she showed no signs of pregnancy, her staff was shocked when she announced it at 7 months, and the story about her water breaking and flying from TX to Alaska during labor is too incredulous.
The major element to this story, however, is that McCain made a dreadful decision to choose Palin without first vetting her.
There is no fucking way he'd have chosen a candidate for her conservative, evangelical, family values bona fides when she had a minor child who was already pregnant.
It's a story about the sheer hypocricy of the Republican party, family dysfunction and absurdity.
And what's the GOP saying about it on the news?
They're blaming the Obama Camp for spreading the rumors.
It's like having a pregnant teen-aged kid is no big deal to these phonies.

Matthew Hubbard said...

Sarah says all the right things for the Family Values crowd, but actions speak louder than words. They HATE career women, and she has a knocked up oldest daughter and went back to work 72 hours after little preemie Trig was born.

I still don't know who the baby mama is. I wish we could rule out the 14 year old Willow. It's a disgusting thought and I blush to type it, but this is a disgusting family.

Anonymous said...

Willow was not absent from school for 4-5 months with "mono," Bristol was.
Still, little Piper is about the only one in that crowd who I don't suspect of anything.

Lulu Maude said...

I doubt that McCain did any more than rubber stamp Palin after fighting like hell for the very icky Joe Lieberman, whom he thought would reinforce his 'maverick' image. Hey, can't get any more 'independent' than choosing Al's old running mate, right?

McCain looks more and more like a pawn. It would be interesting to see how he came to be in that position.

Spread 'em!

Anonymous said...

I've read that Rove was pushing so hard for Romney as VP that McCain finally got pissed off and decided to do something wild to reinforce his self-perceived reputation as a maverick.

Also, Zip how do you know that Willow didn't miss some school to give birth? I think in this crazy family anything is possible. And Levi may be the father of this Irish twin, but it could be a different baby daddy before.

Karen Zipdrive said...

No, there is a picture from a Face Book page (that's since been mysteriously deleted) over at Questions in the Middle of the Night that shows Levi's sister holding Baby Trig. Plus a link on her blog to Gryphon's blog shows more pics.
I wasn't sure what to make of them until I heard the original page was scrubbed.
If Palin has nothing to hide, why is all this shit being hidden?